1. {video :: both courts}

[fulminants]

[ The face that comes onscreen after a few obvious jostles might be one you're familiar with (if you are, sorry, he's probably not the one you're looking for). Johnny's half-concerned, half-amused with the general state of things and it shows in the way he's looking into the locket, clearing his throat. ]

Ever wonder how this feels like some weird State of the Union address? Except with a lot less people. Or maybe it's like making a YouTube video. Here I am, talking to you guys, and I can't even see your faces. [ He shrugs. ] Oh, well -- anyway.

What's up, strangers of Drabwurld? I have three questions: [ Holds up one finger. ] one, why is it called Drabwurld? Did its founders hate being here, or does Brightworld just not have the same ring to it? Ha, there's your thought of the day.

[ Two fingers. ] Two: Anyone seen a big orange walking rockpile lately? Grumpy, looks like he lost a bet with a mudslide? Failing that, how about a guy who can stretch to grossly disproportionate levels, or a girl who can turn invisible? If found, let me know; they can be pretty ornery, and reach dangerous levels of boring when put together for too long.

Three, and I can't believe this didn't come first. It's a very important question, so I'm gonna need all of you to be honest with me, whoever you are.

[ He leans closer to the screen, loses the smile and gets serious. This is crucial. ]

Which side's got the hotter babes? The Seelie, or the Unseelie?

Comments

video;

[boutant]

Uh.

You're not Steve.

[ Yes, well done Ariadne.

This post is just... really weird all around, as far as she's concerned. Let's focus on the important part. ]

... A guy who can stretch?

video;

[fulminants]

Who's Steve?

[ Hey, cutie. ]

Yeeeaaaaah, he's all rubbery, you see. It's a thing. [ He adjusts the screen to get a better look of her. Interesting, these lockets; it's like your standard real-time videochats. ] You seen him?

Video

[starspangled]

[Those words are coming out of a mouth on a face that looks startlingly similar to his own. The combination is unsettling, but he doesn't let it show. Steve's seen and heard worse.

He thinks.]

The polite thing is to introduce yourself before you start asking questions.

[In other words, he's itching for a name.]

Video

[fulminants]

[ Johnny's eyes widen, taken aback by that same face talking back at him. ] Whoa, what the hell? I mean, they said I look like you but --

[ Damn, you're one handsome son of a bitch. Check out the cheekbones. ]

video | private.

[metalica]

Question two. [ He frowns. ] Mutants?

video | private.

[fulminants]

[ To Johnny, who's never heard of the term before, it sounds vaguely disparaging. He's the only one who can poke fun at them, yanno? ]

Hey, that's my family.

[Video]

[dragonring]

[He's gonna stare at the feed for a long, long time. This is weird. Super mega weird. That's Steve's face but sounding like a jock. Sorry for the echo, Johnny, but Dave's feeling exactly the same as Ariadne.]

...you definitely aren't Steve. [Brilliant observation, Dave.] "Allaidh Darach" is the other name for this world if "Drabwurld" bothers you so much.

[Video]

[fulminants]

[ Johnny gets the impression that he's going to have to deal with this for awhile. He looks pleased, all the same. Better than being mistaken for another guy! ]

Right you are! I'm Johnny. [ ...okay that other word's a mouthful. He frowns. ] Is this place Scottish?

video.

[notyetlegend]

[Yeah. Pretty much deciphered that he's not Steve by now.]

Apparently some people find it hard to roll Allaidh Darach off th' tongue.

[She seems to manage it well though, if the accent that sentence comes with is any indication.]

video.

[fulminants]

You do it pretty well.

[ Another pretty face onscreen! A guy can get used to this, definitely. He leans forward, amused -- that accent's very interesting, too. Reminds him of one or two of the girls he'd hooked up with a couple of years ago. ]

Sorry, it's your native tongue, huh?

video.

[slugout]

Dude. [ ?????? ]

Unseelie, definitely, but... did you get brainwashed or something?

video.

[snipers]

[ reaches in from off the frame and flicks his ear ]

video.

[fulminants]

[ ?????????? ]

Brainwashed what now?

Video;

[red_branch]

[He only heard one question--]

Don't matter to me. Beautiful women crop up everywhere, pal.

Video;

[fulminants]

[ excellent, that's the question that matters most, anyway. It'd suck without hot chicks, yanno? Johnny is a man of principles. ]

Best thing I've heard all day, buddy. Which side are you at?

[video]

[hiddeninfidelity]

Babes?

[Mordred blinked in confusion. Of all the knowledge of the modern world the Grail had granted her, the definition of the word "babe" was no where to be found.]

But if you referring to the attractiveness of the maidens here, then that is a matter of opinion and preference.

[video]

[fulminants]

Yeah? [ Johnny's seen quite a few who's very easy on the eyes so far; he's quite inclined to vote in favor of the collective attractiveness of the ladies here. ]

What's your opinion?

video.

[paidto]

Good to know you've got your priorities in order, after bein' thrown into a new world.

[ not that it isn't a nice change from the usual seriousness of the people he's met so far, but that's kind of understandable, considering war. but still, jake's pretty sure that girls shouldn't be the first (or third) thing that comes to mind when thrown somewhere else - maybe he's just weird like that. ]

Really gives people a lot of hope.

video.

[fulminants]

Figured I'd be stuck for awhile, gotta make the best of it, right?

[ And what better way to get a taste of the general populace? That, and Johnny's not big on the downers. Makes a dude prematurely old.

He grins. ]

Hey, man. I'm all about the giving.

voice.

[snipers]

Huh, I guess the doppelganger theory is true, at least when it comes to other universes.

voice.

[fulminants]

Doesn't that theory mean that when you see your doppelganger, you're gonna kick it soon?

[ THIS IS VERY TROUBLING NEWS, LADY. ]

video

[wipedclean]

Those are your questions?

[It's not like he had a high opinion of him when they met at the feast, but really, of all the things to ask, he goes with that?]

video

[fulminants]

[ THOSE ARE PERFECTLY LEGITIMATE QUESTIONS ]

Pretty much. You only live once, right?

video;

[desperate_times]

[What... another face double? He's not the first one she's seen, since she saw a guy who looks exactly like Lancelot during the last batch, but now it's happening more and it's just plain crazy.

So yes, long pause with staring before she comes to her first natural thought.]

Weeeeeird. But oddly erotic.

video;

[fulminants]

[ Okay, pretty lady, the staring's making him just a little uncomfortable. ]

Oddly erotic?

[ What? ]

Video

[benumbing]

[Jack is staring, not because he thinks Johnny looks like anyone. It's basically just the same look he gives him every time he opens his mouth.]

I'm sober and you're still here...

Video

[fulminants]

[ Oh, he's quite acquainted with that particular look by now. Johnny grins, deciding to tease him. ]

Why are you hoping that I'm a figment of your imagination?

video.

[kyosu]

Orange...walking rockpile? A golem?

[ You just can't call people golems, Sakura! ]

video.

[fulminants]

[ IT'S COOL ]

Does golem mean 'giant cranky rock-like creature'?

video;

[invisibletouch]

Youtube?

[An important question we must all ask at some point.]

video;

[fulminants]

It's a video site, full of all sorts of things you can watch. You don't have them?