[video | locked to Unseelie]

[tacticalturtleneck]

Wait, Unseelie fans. I've got something for you.

It's called....Lacrosse.

Wait, what was that? We've got more important things to worry about?

How about you

SHUT UP

Don't even waste my time with that. This is a direct order from the Queen herself. Who is also extremely hot. The hottest Queen since Queen Elizabeth's younger years who I actually don't know what she looks like but she was the first Queen to come to mind.

Seriously, sign up. I'll supply all the equipment, money, and training so you won't have any excuses. You just have to play and have some fun. If I get a few teams going, hell we can have a tournament and a betting pool to go around.

Huh, you have something else to say? What's Lacrosse good for?

Uh, the glutes for one thing. Who doesn't like a shapely ass? Play Lacrosse and you'll get laid constantly, guaranteed. It's also good for teamwork which means when you tag in a second person, there will be double the pleasure.

Did I mention gambling, because I totally did. You'll totally make out like a Native American (I'm like 1/16th Cherokee so that's not racist).

Oh, yeah, it's an all-age sport. So don't try anything with the kids, sickos.

So who wants to sign up and who wants to recommend team names?

Comments

[herotypical]

[ wow. she can't tell if she's being complimented or scolded. ]

I guess nut-cracking isn't...totally out of the realm of my possibility. [ ... ] Look. I'm not really a sporty kinda person. But...

[ maybe it's good. someone putting resources and effort into something outside this huge war they're all chatting about. ] I guess if you wanted a hand moving stuff or shouting from the sidelines I would be -- just about barely -- qualified.

[tacticalturtleneck]

Could I interest you in a spot as a camera man? Woman.

...that's a gendered statement that needs to be addressed.

[herotypical]

Plus, I assume you mean locket-woman. See? All meaning is eroding even as we speak.

[tacticalturtleneck]

Yeah, well.....so what?

You going to do it?

[herotypical]

Maybe.

What's in it for me?

[tacticalturtleneck]

....money and fame. Do you need anything else?

[herotypical]

I can do without the fame. [ she's not so fond of the spotlight. ] But money? Money would be...nice. We could use a little scratch.

[ we. yes. buffy is a proud legal guardian. at the moment even though dawn is actually no longer in the drabwurld ]

[tacticalturtleneck]

Great, you're hired! You should be an announcer too but I'll let that pass.

[herotypical]

[ oh no you've woken the beast called buffy's indignation. ] What? Don't you trust me? I could be...announce-y. I use words. Often to great effect.

[tacticalturtleneck]

Yeah but do you think you can work hand in hand with Professor Spaniard? That guy has the whole "GOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAL" vibe going on.

[herotypical]

Who the bejeezus is Professor Spaniard and please tell me that's not his real name?

[tacticalturtleneck]

Some bloody englishman with long black hair. Probably some kind of nerd but he's definitely rocking that Spanish look.

[herotypical]

Wait. I'm confused. [ time for a blonde moment. ] Is he Spanish? Or English? Or both. I mean -- I'm guessing people can be both. Both's doable, right?

[tacticalturtleneck]

You can't tell with those rich Eurolosers. They're all inbred.

[herotypical]

H-hey. I've known some decent across-the-ponders. Y'know. In my time.

[ code: she's totally slept with one. maybe two. ]

[tacticalturtleneck]

Decent? If you can get past the bad breath and terrible teeth.

[herotypical]

You've clearly met some exclusively shady Brits.

[ except she can't really argue on the teeth thing. fangs? not very attractive. ]

[tacticalturtleneck]

You're talking about a bunch of people who would swear up and down that Irish people were black. They're all shady.

[herotypical]

And yet you gotta admit they got some great words. Charming words. You'd barely think they were cussing each other out, the words are so damn darling.

[tacticalturtleneck]

You mean like...

[British Accent Archer]

...you're all fur coat and no knickers!

[herotypical]

[ good lord. it seems buffy summers is capable of laughter. ]

Exactly. Throw in a few casual buggerations and I'd never know you from the real thing.

[tacticalturtleneck]

...holy shit!

[herotypical]

What? Is buggeration not de rigueur?

[tacticalturtleneck]

No. I was just thinking how hard of a boner I got when you laughed.

1/2

[herotypical]

Ew. Gross. No -- ugh, shut up.

[ except... ]