[video | locked to Unseelie]

[tacticalturtleneck]

Wait, Unseelie fans. I've got something for you.

It's called....Lacrosse.

Wait, what was that? We've got more important things to worry about?

How about you

SHUT UP

Don't even waste my time with that. This is a direct order from the Queen herself. Who is also extremely hot. The hottest Queen since Queen Elizabeth's younger years who I actually don't know what she looks like but she was the first Queen to come to mind.

Seriously, sign up. I'll supply all the equipment, money, and training so you won't have any excuses. You just have to play and have some fun. If I get a few teams going, hell we can have a tournament and a betting pool to go around.

Huh, you have something else to say? What's Lacrosse good for?

Uh, the glutes for one thing. Who doesn't like a shapely ass? Play Lacrosse and you'll get laid constantly, guaranteed. It's also good for teamwork which means when you tag in a second person, there will be double the pleasure.

Did I mention gambling, because I totally did. You'll totally make out like a Native American (I'm like 1/16th Cherokee so that's not racist).

Oh, yeah, it's an all-age sport. So don't try anything with the kids, sickos.

So who wants to sign up and who wants to recommend team names?

Comments

[herotypical]

-- As an announcer. Wow. Presume, much?

[ huff. ] Wait. What do you mean -- somewhat pretty?

[ trainwreck. ]

[tacticalturtleneck]

You know, for a guy? It's totally not gay to say another guy is pretty.

[herotypical]

Nah. It's fair. I'm just thinking -- maybe you should introduce us. A girl should get to know her fellow -- uhm -- announcer. Y'know?

What's his name?

[tacticalturtleneck]

Professor Spaniard.

[That was the only name he was given....]

Hey, wait a second. I saw him first, you keep your filthy valley paws off him!

[herotypical]

[ she waggles her fingers in front of the locket. ]

Excuse you. These valley paws are exquisitely manicured. Not filthy at all.

[tacticalturtleneck]

I've got my eyes on you.......

[herotypical]

You already sad he wasn't your type. There's no use getting all possessive about it now.

[tacticalturtleneck]

Don't be jealous of my manswag.

[herotypical]

Jealous? Of--?

Mister, I don't even wanna hear about your manswag.

[tacticalturtleneck]

Yeah, well, no one wants to hear you, Missy! Pssssssshhhhhhhh, iceburn.

[herotypical]

They don't? Sweet. Guess that counts me out of the sports-personality running.

[tacticalturtleneck]

....this suddenly turned into a lose-lose situation.

[herotypical]

You should get used to it.