eachdraidh | Video - Seelie/Unseelie

[Stiles hasn't used the lockets until today, a day spent flicking mostly through the posts and seeing how to actually work this thing and, oh, okay. Like that. It was like a weird magical phone set to Skype. Okay. He could do that.

Smile into the camera, Stiles.]

Hey there, uh, fairy people. And non-fairy people. And, uh, the draconically inclined. Or furry. I don't... just... hi. So, in light of the whole worm thing, which by the way, eww, I have a question. Since there seem to be a lot of, um, not exactly human people around and ones who have skills with like, swords and magic and stuff, ah, what... hypothetically speaking, would someone who was just a regular, normal, average human be able to do here? You know, besides hiding under tables and throwing rocks ineffectively?

[This was a very important question, Drabwurld. He wasn't a werewolf or a wizard or witch or... any of the multitude of people here that he'd run into. His coordination was subpar and, well, he didn't really have any skills that included cutting the heads off of giant worms or not getting eaten by dragons if they felt the need.]

Just, ah, I guess just reply here, if you want. Or leave a message if you're looking at it later. 'Kay. Uh, thanks.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Well... screw them. They shouldn't have brought us here.

Don't change that we are.

Which is screwed. Screwed with big target signs on our heads that say 'I taste good, come eat me.'

It's what kings and queens do. They take folk for whatever purpose they like, no matter what they say. Last it happened to me, I didn't get no fancy room to stay in.

Kings and queens can suck my-- ... is that what's making you okay with this? The guest quarters?

[He snorts.]

I ain't been in my room since I first arrived. What need of I for that much space? They invited me to come, I was fool enough to agree.

Well... huh. I was asleep and thought it was a dream. Otherwise I would have said no. I don't want to be here and they can take their shard and shove it up their asses.

[So there.]

Best you work on finding a way to make that happen.

I'm trying.

Failing, maybe, but still trying. But, while I'm here, I also don't want to be worm food. Which is kind of why I need to figure out something else.

Multitasking.

[With a growing impatience.]

You don't want to fight. Seems you don't want to fight. So find a job. Work. You can work, can't you?

Who would? Seriously. What person wakes up and says 'gee, I think I'll just go run around almost dying today. Sounds like a plan'?

[The job idea did have merit, but he wasn't sure how any of that worked here.]

You found a Magical Classifieds section in the Pixie Press that I don't know about?

... there's a Pixie Press? What's that?

[WHOOSH.]

...

Never mind. It's not a thing. I was just...

[SIGH, GENDRY]

Never mind.

[His genius is never appreciated.]

[Gendry scowls, feeling like somehow he's being mocked.]

I found a forge to work in. Didn't have no one tell me to work it. I just did.

[No, Gendry. It was just Stiles being Stiles and getting frustrated that the guy couldn't get it because of the... world difference.]

Yeah? Well... that's nice. We don't exactly teach people forge skills or anything like that where I come from. My skills are pretty useless here, so unless we can win whatever we need to win with an Xbox or lacrosse stick, I'm boned.

Seems you're good at complaining. Might be someone will pay you for that.

Oh, look at you. You're funny. So very funny. Maybe someone will pay you for that.

[Lineface.]

Don't need to. The guts of those worms was filled with gold and jewels. But you seem funny enough and there's some high lords here. One might want to hire you as a fool.

... You mean like those old fashioned guys with the jester hats and acrobatics, right? Nah, I'm more of the stand up comedy type that points out how much everyone sucks. I could go pro.

Why would you need to point out other people sucking? Seems it should be obvious that they're sucking on something.

...

We need like, a modern to ye old days translator. Sucking is a euphemism. Like, they're bad at something. They suck at it. Between you and the redhead... I don't know, man.

You speak well enough already. Work on making sense a bit more and you'll manage without a translator.

It makes sense if you come from my millennium.

[Okay, maybe not. Maybe only the last fifty years or so, but whatever. His point was still valid.]

What millennium is that?

[... and what's a millennium?]

Two thousand and eleven.

[Bitcheeeeeeeeeeeees]

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