eachdraidh | Video - Seelie/Unseelie

[Stiles hasn't used the lockets until today, a day spent flicking mostly through the posts and seeing how to actually work this thing and, oh, okay. Like that. It was like a weird magical phone set to Skype. Okay. He could do that.

Smile into the camera, Stiles.]

Hey there, uh, fairy people. And non-fairy people. And, uh, the draconically inclined. Or furry. I don't... just... hi. So, in light of the whole worm thing, which by the way, eww, I have a question. Since there seem to be a lot of, um, not exactly human people around and ones who have skills with like, swords and magic and stuff, ah, what... hypothetically speaking, would someone who was just a regular, normal, average human be able to do here? You know, besides hiding under tables and throwing rocks ineffectively?

[This was a very important question, Drabwurld. He wasn't a werewolf or a wizard or witch or... any of the multitude of people here that he'd run into. His coordination was subpar and, well, he didn't really have any skills that included cutting the heads off of giant worms or not getting eaten by dragons if they felt the need.]

Just, ah, I guess just reply here, if you want. Or leave a message if you're looking at it later. 'Kay. Uh, thanks.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Three hundred. [Mildly, as his mind makes sense of a world that might evolve in seventeen hundred years.]

Yeah. In the three hundreds, people lived in castles and had serfs and servants and knights and stuff.

And what do they have in your two thousands? Besides lots of people sucking things, that is.

Um, everything. Planes, trains, automobiles. Nintendo. Xbox. Pizza in thirty minutes or it's free. Porn.

[He could say porn, right? Yeah, this was a guy. Guys could say porn around other guys.]

[Absolutely none of that made sense. So he decides to just latch onto the last one.]

Porn?

[Of course that was the one the guy latched onto.]

Uh, yeah. Porn. Like... people doing... things. On film. For everyone to see.

Doing things? What things?

[It took him a little fiddling with the locket to figure out how to lock the conversation, but he found the right thing and kept the rest of this between just the two of them. The last thing he needed was all of fairy world thinking he was a pervert.]

Sex things.

We call them whores in my world. That's the sort of thing you like, is it?

[There's a trace of scorn in his tone.]

To watch? God yes. I'm picturing your old time brothels with like, wenches and boobs and... no. That's nowhere near the quality of porn.

[Ha ha ha... porn and quality in the same sentence. Really, Stiles?]

Guys and girls. Or girls and girls. Or guys and guys, if that's your thing. Or girls and guys and girls and guys and an inflatable sheep. I don't know. Porn is... it's varied.

And don't give me that look, buddy. Like you don't have a spank bank.

It's not my thing. I don't sleep with whores. [Which he is assuming Stiles does, because mostly this conversation is a confused mess. But his mother was a whore. He now realized he had a half sister that was a whore. And though whores had tried to coax him into a bed, he'd never relented.]

And I don't have one of those... spank. Banks. [He can only guess what sort of thing that might be.]

First off, rude. Prostitution is a pretty necessary vocation. Secondly, judgy much? You have that snobby tone like I do. Which would make you wrong, since I don't sleep with anyone.

[Okay, lie. He'd slept with one person, but that didn't really count in this conversation, okay? Okay.]

You're trying to tell me you don't have a collection of thoughts and scenarios that you spank it to? Play the solo flute? Choke the chicken? Jerk off? Are you a monk. Oh, wait, no, they have eunuchs, don't they? Did you get it all snipped off?

[... well now that he's thoroughly insulted.]

How about you find a sword, I find a sword, and I spank you until hiding under tables ain't an issue no longer.

So... you're into spanking, huh? Kinky.

[SO ENDS THE CONVERSATION. Because Gendry glares, then snaps his locket shut. And then goes back to MAKING HIS OWN SWORD.]

Video - Seelie/Unseelie

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