eachdraidh | video ( open to seelie + unseelie )

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video ( open to seelie + unseelie )

[ The feed opens with Hermione in the library - where else would she be? - in the Seelie court, a pile of books and papers around her. It's obvious she's been reading and taking notes, going deeper and deeper into as many of the shelves as she can (and the only place she hasn't been allowed access is the Restricted Area, which she is going to get permission for soon). After a moment of brushing her hair out of her face and forcing a slightly brighter smile she leans forward, into the 'camera'. ]

Hello, everyone. My name is Hermione Granger, for anyone I haven't met yet, and I was just wondering if you'd mind answering a few questions I have?

[ She pauses for a moment, grabbing a piece of paper with a list on it and smoothing it out. ]

I was wondering if you'd all be able to tell me about magic, or powers, or anything that might not be considered 'normal' to the average human or otherwise that exist in your worlds? Maybe magical creatures, too, or beings that you think do not transcend to other places that you've heard of. In my world, if it's alright to call them that, we have magic, magical creatures and humans, giants, werewolves, vampires... But a lot of worlds - or universes, I suppose - don't.

[ She smiles, almost sheepish, shy. ]

I hope this isn't too intrusive, I'm just curious and I'd love to learn more, if I'm able.

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[ while most of the demigods he knows are half-bloods, he supposes he understands what she means by prejudice and nastiness. percy's brother is a cyclops, a son of poseidon, but not one anyone particularly wishes to praise and raise high upon their shoulders and worship, not like how they do with percy himself, or even hercules. ]

Half-blood. [ now that's a term he knows and a train of thought he can possibly follow. as far as he's concerned, nicholas flamel is an alchemist who has died — he doesn't feel any desire to bring that up, considering his dad merely exists in myths to most of the people in drabwurld (and back home). maybe the history books forgot to mention he managed to whip up an immortal juice, after all. ] Let me take a wild guess and say that means one mortal parent and one magical one.

Exactly. It can mean, though, a parent who is muggleborn and a parent who is pureblood or half-blood. The specifics are a little strange, honestly, and it's mostly the purebloods who believe in the idea of pureblood supremacy that hold on to those ideals. There are some rather nasty people out there that would do, and have done, terrible things to those they think are lesser somehow.

[ She falters, watching him warily, shaking her head, before she breathes out and swallows the developing lump in her throat. She shifts in her chair, pushing the papers away, fingering at her wrist before she lifts her head gently. ]

But I'm getting a little bit off topic, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to go into such a tangent.

[ luke cocks a brow at her tangled explanation. in the demigod world, he guesses a pureblood is zeus and hera coming together to pop out more kids. as much as he'd like a written definition that covers all the possible couplings that make a kid a half-blood, he refrains from asking for the diagram. ]

[ while nasty fights are no stranger to him — hadn't he almost destroyed manhattan over one? — he finds himself missing a piece of the puzzle. while all demigods are as powerful as the next, he finds they're split into a few different categories: the unclaimed, the claimed, and one of the big three. the terms and conditions say they're all on equal footing, but luke knows it's all a load of bullshit. ]

[ he almost shakes his head at her apology, it not completely necessary, but he supposes him picking up on her tangent is a way of voicing his refusal of accepting it. his brows furrow. ] Do these pureblood guys have more magic or whatever than you half-bloods and muggleborns?

No, of course not. People have strengths and weaknesses, of course, but there's no proof that muggleborn or half-blood witches and wizards are any weaker than purebloods. My best friend is a half-blood and he's one of the strongest people I've ever met and some of the purebloods I know are horrible, awful people. I'm a muggleborn and I've always been top of my class when it comes to magical education, above all the purebloods that think I'm weaker.

[ Her hand clenches and she nods her head, once, closing her eyes and composing herself. Mudblood and proud, she kept reminding herself. Muggleborn and proud. She had no shame about her heritage, she was proud of herself more than anyone could possibly imagine -- she was the brightest witch of her generation, for Merlin's sake! ]

It's just prejudice, really, the idea that someone born to muggles can't be strong or powerful. It's why there was a war in my world.

[ luke frowns. blood purity hadn't been the core of his own war, fought simply to open the eyes of the gods to the damage they inflicted on the kids they damned when they brought them into the world. if they weren't destined for greatness, the godly parent didn't care what became of them. the battle of manhattan, the titan war itself, had been about teaching the gods a lesson — to rectify the mistakes they had made, neglecting their kids to survive in the world shrouded in darkness rather than in the light with a parent's hand illuminating the way. the war of hermione granger's world sounds redundant to luke, accomplishing nothing but bloodshed — and maybe some semblance of equality, but if the parents had been doing their jobs right — ]

I'm sorry. [ it's a little ironic the catalyst for the titan war is sorry for another's war. one could even say his war is built on prejudice, if they chose not to look at all the facts correctly. ] It sounds kind of redundant, though. A pureblood is a half-blood is a muggleborn. It shouldn't matter about what blood your parents are, it should only matter about how they treat you. [ welcome to the crux of the titan war. ] If having a pureblood parent means they'll neglect you the moment you don't seem to be the top of some class, then, yeah, there's a cause for a fight.

Exactly. Blood status is an archaic means of treating other people badly for no reason whatsoever - and there is a whole society based around it, as though people born from muggles are somehow weaker or lesser or - or stupider than they are. I can tell you right now that none of that is true; I wasn't called the brightest witch of my age for no reason and I showed them that blood is meaningless compared to brains and heart and bravery. [ She purses her lips, looking a little determined, clenching a hand around her forearm before she breathes out and relaxes, finally. ]

I can't say much for their childhood, really, because not a lot of purebloods were particularly keen to be friendly with me, at least outside of my Hosue at school. I think... It's a little like being in the upper class of muggle society, really. It all depends on how your parents were raised -- which I suppose is the norm for any household.

[ it's a lot of information, but luke treats it like searching on the internet: he absorbs the information, feels overwhelmed, and picks and chooses the words that pop out in front of him. usually, it's the keywords he's after. he thinks he's plucked the important bits from her. but he nods, to himself, brows raised, and voice almost finalised, as though he knows exactly what she's speaking of — and he's beginning to, with every moment she goes on one of her passionate rambles. ] Huh. So, Purebloods are the uptight, rich people with their noses inserted up their asses. [ luke pulls a face, lips pursed, as though this description is on par with the sky is blue. ] Good to know.

But what House were you in? [ it sounds almost like the cabins, being sorted into a god's house. but luke doubts all the witches and wizards and whatever comes in between were sorted into cabins at this magical school of hers based on their parentage. did she get sorted into the house of muggleborns, like he, the son of hermes, had been sorted into the house of hermes? ]

[ hermione watches him warily, unsure about continuing - not because she doesn't think he understands but because the very culture of the world she comes from is still a sore spot and she doesn't want any echoes to hurt him. she nods her head, awkwardly, at the basic summary of pureblood culture; rich and a little uptight, yes. ] That's the majority, but please don't think it's a stereotype. The world is changing and things are getting much, much better. It's just taking a little time.

[ oh, now there's a question. her lips curl into a proud little smile and she sits a little taller, exceptionally proud of herself and her house, obviously. ] Gryffindor. The Sorting Hat - the magical hat that reads our minds and tells us where we belong - described it in a song. 'You might belong in Gryffindor where dwell the brave at heart. Their daring, nerve and chivalry set Gryffindors apart.'

[ if only luke knew that those words were reflective of the shitstorm he had been at the centre of, spurring it on by being deaf and blind and stupid to all around him, cradled beneath the thumb of a titan who cared very little. it's how he'd describe the gods — with their heads shoved right up their own asses. it's difficult to bite it down, condemning the gods, but considering he has a feeling jason has already sunk his lightning bolts into hermione, he would've talked the gods up real good. ]

[ luke's brows rise. the magical hat that reads our minds and tells us where we belong. whether he finds it strange — or completely and utterly strange, as there's no other option but to find it weird — is quite apparent on his face. ] I think I'd prefer a magical hat that sings than be sorted by parentage. [hermes' son and proud? nah. ] So, you're a … Gryffindor. [ he frowns. despite knowing greek and other odd words, it still sounds just that — odd. he smiles, possibly in an effort to tease her, or have the brightest witch of her age deny that she is anything but what he's going to bluntly assume. ] Sounds like you know how to live on the wild side, then.

[ he's taking it in his stride, which means a lot to her, really. she knows some people could easily dismiss her as insane - a magical hat that puts them into houses in a magical school where she leans magic - but he's understanding and it wraps around her and makes her feel warm and happy inside. she just yearns for acceptance here, just as she had in her first years at school, and finding it is - well. it's making her feel a might more comfortable, that's for certain. ]

It does make things easier, even if some of the houses still take parentage into account. [ slytherin, of course. ] Gryffindor and proud, yes. A lot of people think we're idiots or foolish in our loyalty, but we're not. Being brave and strong in our beliefs and friendships doesn't make us stupid. [ and she's proof of that. still, she can't fight the grin that spreads across her face. ] That depends. What do you consider a wild side?

[ he's certain it makes them reckless. despite not knowing anything about the other houses, he thinks gryffindor speaks of thalia. brave and loyal, but so utterly foolish, too. ]

[ what does a wild side mean to a kid of hermes? well. ] It may not be in your blood, but you sure do sound like a Hermes kid with your daring nerve. [ stealing things, breaking rules, basically being a pain in the ass. hermes is daring, going from realm to realm, taking messages that could see him roast simply because the content hadn't been something that appeased the recipient. luke should be a burnt stain on the floor of olympus after having swiped the master lightning bolt and forever to never be at peace in the realm of death for having stolen the helm of darkness. despite having stolen both items for kronos, it'd made him feel more alive. but rather than get into it, he simply sums it up with: ] It means you're not boring.

No, I don't think I'm boring at all.

[ once upon a time, maybe, she had been. a silly little girl in her first year, so desperate to prove herself despite her heritage that she had alienated everyone until reality had come crashing down on her - almost literally. since then she had been quite reckless in her time, helping protect harry and keep him and their friends alive throughout a war that should've destroyed them from the inside out. instead, they managed to survive, to come out the other side stronger, and she knew that she was, in part, to thank for that.

she does preen a little, though, lifting her head. ] I helped fight a troll when I was twelve, brewed a Potion meant for people twice my age when I was thirteen, travelled in time when I was fourteen, fought in a battle where I almost died when I was sixteen, survived a year of hiding from people wanting to kill me when I was almost eighteen and fought in a war to help save my world a little after that. Does that count?

[ at least she's not going to play it off by completely undermining what she reveals of her résumé by pretending that she is boring. despite the raise of his eyebrows — and how impressed he feels, hearing her list things she has been capable of since twelve, a list similar to his own, but perhaps less isolated and born of anger and confusion — he lifts a shoulder, nose wrinkling, as he mulls over her list. ] A little. It only really counts if you had fun. [ which, really, doesn't sound like a very fun life to live. ]

I'll admit, the whole time travelling thing is a little weird. Doubt that's a thing back in the Land of Demigods. [ if it was? luke would've stolen the object — as it has to be an object, not a simple power — and would've changed history, starting with may 27, 1986. ] But that's the life of a demigod. Consistent monsters. Don't know if the others you've spoken to have given you the rundown on the cons of being a kid of some Greek dude or lady.

Some of it was fun. Other parts really weren't. I wouldn't change any of it for the world, of course not, but I do think parts of my childhood were left at the wayside. [ she, harry and ron all had to mature far too fast - all of their generation did in the face of an oncoming war that was impossible to simply pretend wasn't happening. especially when you were the chosen one and his two best friends, the people who would never abandon him no matter where his path took him. that was the choice they had made as harry's partners and one she knew both herself and ron couldn't truly regret, despite their losses.

she does shake her head, though, smile still present. ] It's not exactly common for us, either, but I had special permission and... Well. I might have broken the law, just a little, but for a very, very good reason. [ saving sirius' life had been the best reason and had granted harry a few years of happiness before even that was taken from him. ] I've heard a few things, yes, about the side-effects and the upsets it can cause.

[ all luke hears are words that he's thought, once or twice, over the last few years. if things were different, maybe that nine year old kid never would've run from home, scared and confused and too angry for such a young boy to ever feel. he would change so much, just to experience something he had been striving for since the moment he had located the word on the tip of his tongue. he thinks to say something, maybe a throwaway yeah, i know, but he doesn't even allow himself that. ]

[ despite the pensive furrow to his brow, his expression smooths out. ] If you ever get a chance to choose a lifestyle, say no to the door with the demigod label. [ it's not a happy one — or it's not for this kid, anyway. twenty-four and still holding a grudge that had begun to develop at age nine. ] Turn back time and pick another, if you make that mistake. I'm sure the brightest witch of her age wouldn't misstep, anyway. [ his face pinches. ] All that's behind that door is monsters. A lot of them. And they don't ever really die. [ and he doesn't simply mean those she may read about in her greek myths, either. there's a monster haunting luke, and has been, for quite some time. despite the leucrotae being capable of being slain, this one lingers, untouchable. ]

Monsters never really die, though, do they? No matter what choices we make. They're particularly good at haunting us, even in our bravest of moments. [ she twitches a little, her hand going to her arm, squeezing the muscle there and the scar underneath, hidden from view but burned into her memory like the brand that is was. she had never felt so broken, so dehumanised before, treated like cattle, branded in ownership and disgust, the hatred making it impossible for her to magically remove the imprint. but, at the same time, it had made her so much stronger, so much prouder, to have faced so much pain and horror and come out of it on the other side. ]

I don't think many people would choose our lives, witches or demigods or otherwise. It might seem very grand, having all these powers and spells and gifts, but... It's not that easy. There is a lot more responsibility than people expect and sometimes we have to do things that we regret just to keep going, to keep fighting. I would never abandon this life, the things that have happened to me, but it doesn't stop me wishing some of it were at least a little different, that I could save the people I loved some of their pain. [ she pauses, then, swallowing the lump in her throat and glancing down, hiding her expression from the camera. ]

Sorry. I got a little carried away.

[ it's as though she's cast one of her little charms, prying into his own thoughts, ones surfacing and ones sinking beneath the waves to embed themselves into the bed below. luke's quiet, if only to hear the words those around him are almost afraid to even speak. he doubts clarisse or jason, or even nico — but perhaps the latter, with the sister, or mother, or whoever he has lost since he had been trapped in the lotus casino, he'll never see them again, not even with his gift to bring forth the dead with an offering of mcdonalds or whatever it is he happens to have on hand — would admit to wanting to change something. clarisse has her dad's blessing, having slain the drakon with her bare hands; jason's the son of zeus, or his roman counterpart, a beacon of shining light; and nico's just nico, the kid of hades, with too much compassion for a personification of death. he doubts any of them would change too much of their lives, not to the extent luke would. ]

I don't know, I don't really need to get a key cut to open my front door. [ but being the kid of hermes had doomed luke to a life of running, of being afraid, and since he had been the son of may castellan, to be incredibly alone in a house filled with sounds and scents of a woman who was never truly there. ] If it were a perfect world, we'd be able to save those we love from everything. But not even with all the powers on hand can any of us even do that. Zeus can't save his marriage, even though he's the big boss of us all. And Hades can't bring back those he cares about. [ if he cares about anyone. hades had to trick persephone into being with him. if he were a true god, one of the big three, wouldn't he be able to simply woo her with his personality and charm? abusing his power had doomed him to a cursed myth of romance, damaging the reputation between him and persephone to those who bother to google hades and persephone. luke shrugs. ] Seems more like a doomed life to me.

Maybe we're all just limited by what people think of us. [ she hesitates, unsure about continuing, before her expression hardens and she nods. she might not know everything about the mythology and reality of luke's world but she can certainly try and dismantle it to understand it, try and offer a perspective he might not have imagined. it seems like something she could do and she wants to see him smile rather than see that look of uncertainty traced across his expression. even if it takes her the months they might be stuck here she wants to try - because no one deserves to feel adrift, no one deserves to feel like they have no one or nothing, or that they can't focus on the future instead of the past. it's too much for one person to deal with, surely?

she thinks so, at least, and she had seen it in practice when harry had tried to deal with the world all by himself. ] We hear so many stories about what people are supposed to be and how they're supposed to act, we forget that they're just people too. Being a God doesn't stop you from making mistakes or acting in ways that people might not expect - and being the boss of everyone doesn't make you omniscient or omnipotent, trust me, I know. Even the greatest and most powerful people make mistakes they wish they could undo - I've seen that, too.

[ she hesitates, looking away for a moment, almost too sharply for herself to handle. ]

But it's not a perfect world and we make mistakes. We do what we think is right, either for ourselves or for the people we love, and we have to just... Fight to keep ourselves going. Because if we give up and dwell on turning back time then we've already lost the battle, haven't we?

[ where he had intended to perhaps be a dick about demigods, seeing how much she knew of the myths and testing her against them, the conversation has detoured down a path luke wants to break away from, opting to venture into the dark wilderness he doesn't know how to navigate, despite his inbuilt gps, and try his luck. it's the titan war, it's hermes, it's thalia and annabeth and even percy, who come to his mind now; it reminds him of something he thinks jason would say, inspiring hope where there is none. but luke doesn't want to think of hermes as wanting to undo the mistakes he has done, capable of changing his son's path as he had been privy to the prophecy and his doomed future, but had done nothing to interfere, not even taking his mother beneath his wing and somehow helping her. but isn't everything hermione has just said what he wants to do? make up for his mistakes, own them, and move on, proving himself to not be that kid, truly? gods — and titans — are selfish. and luke knows he is, himself. ]

I guess so. [ it's clear luke doesn't particularly want to believe it, as it completely undermines his anger, and the grudge he still holds, even now. ] But is it really a loss if you want to go back and change things, anyway? Hindsight's a pretty good thing to have in your arsenal. Wisdom and all that.

[ his nose wrinkles at a face he pulls, as though the movement of his muscles and his skin will somehow throw the weight he suddenly feels from his entire body. it only sinks further, as it always has. ] I know us Hermes kids aren't really wise, but … unlocking things and stealing things is what we're good at. Sometimes you want to go back and unlock that door just a little bit slower. Where you end up might be a little less ... [ pressing his lips together, he pulls a word that doesn't quite encompass what he wants it to. ] monstery. [ and perhaps halcyon green would still be alive today. but would he have ever met annabeth? it's what hermione's getting at, changing things will cause a ripple effect — and, besides, why would he wish to change the good parts of his life, even inadvertently? ]

You see, that's the problem. Everyone imagines hindsight to be this great gift, allowing us to see what mistakes we'd made so that, in the future, we can fix it, but in a way it's more like a curse. It's not a good thing to know your past and try to go back and change it, that's why there are so many restrictions on time travel and the effects it can have. You can say that you'd like to go back and fix your mistakes which, of course, is admirable, but -- don't you think that, by fixing them, you're changing yourself? You're becoming someone different than the man - or woman - that went back to change the mistakes in the first place. Who's to say that, once you've gone back, you'd want to change them?

[ time travel, analogies, all of it is rather complex and despite having spent a year basically doing double time (she was, actually, closer to twenty-one than twenty) there isn't a lot hermione does, truly, know about time travel. it's still all very open and a very technical topic and she doesn't want to be That Person but it seems she's stumbled into it all the same. sheepish, she bows her head, trying to ignore the flush crossing her cheeks at her reply, the lecture she's handing out as though she's some kind of authority. ]

It's not a loss to want to change things, of course not. But understanding the mistakes we've made and trying to make ourselves better from them? That isn't something you should just throw away to make things easier. We become stronger and wiser from our experiences, not weaker.

[ she pauses, then she lifts her head, smiling softly. he's a son of hermes, right? and what she remembers of him, yes, he's the patron of thieves, but... ]

You're not just moulded by who your parents are, you know. Your father might be the God of thieves, but he's also the patron of sports, travellers and trade, too, isn't he? And shepherds. There's nothing saying you have to be like your father and be a thief or someone that picks locks.

[ she swallows, then, because, really, she is entirely unsure of the mythology of his world, but - she's started, so she has to finish. ]

There's precedent that says I should be a quiet, lowly mudblood and I should keep my mouth shut and leave things for those of pure status to sort out. But I won't, because that's not who I am. I'm more than my heritage, Luke, and so are you. I don't think you're giving yourself enough credit and I don't think you're seeing what kind of an amazing future you could have.

[ a pause, then she bites her lip. ]

I'm sorry if that was all a little... Forward. I get carried away sometimes.

Edited (what are words) 2014-07-04 11:30 (UTC)

[ it's on the tip of his tongue to confess to hermione granger, the brightest witch of her age, a daring and brave and incredibly loyal griffindor, of all the things he has hid up his sleeve in a bid to see her stubborn refusal to believe anyone would wish to change so much of themselves into bits. if she knew of the titan war, if she knew of kronos, if she knew of may castellan, if she knew of hermes and halcyon green and even zeus, trapping thalia beneath root rather than breathing life back into her lungs, perhaps she would see that he wishes to change it all for them. ]

[ luke frowns at mudblood, a word she hasn't uttered once during their conversation. she's thrown out terms that sound odd to even him, a kid born of a greek myth and humanity, but that one hasn't passed her lips yet. he thinks to deter her from this path by throwing that out toward her, but he thinks it a bad idea, not quite liking the way she phrases it, as though it means something bad. ]

[ it's the amazing future, though, that almost has him saying i don't have one. it'd ended in olympus with the dagger that had originally been his in his side. and he doubts he'll have one here, either, despite jason and nico attempting to tie themselves to him, as though they're some unbreakable trio. ]

[ despite wanting to tell her she doesn't need to apologise, what comes out isn't defined in a harsh tone, but one that implies he knows a little more than what she may, regardless of the books she may have read, on wishing to shape — or not shape — himself in his father's image. ] I'd want to change it for other people. [ which sounds weak, given her own argument, hitting too many nails deeply within the plank of wood of the house he wished to dismantle with his anger. instead of allowing him to rip it piece by piece, pulling the nails out with the back of the hammer, she rips the tool from his hand and slams the nail back in. ] It's different. [ it's really not, but — ] You should fight against the blood privilege that's going on back in the world of Gryffindors. If you let them snuff out your voice, then you're just letting them win the war. Nothing will change if you let them define you as a lowly mud — [ he shakes his head, pursing his lips slightly. it's almost like being claimed and unclaimed, unclaimed such a dirty word to say to those who linger within the hermes cabin, half complete. ] — I may be the son of Hermes, but I'm not just another kid in his herd. I don't follow him blindly. Even if I'm lucky enough to know who it is I'm the kid of. [ claimed and unclaimed, it's not a story anyone wishes to hear, not from the mouth of luke castellan, anyway. ]

[ he shrugs, nonchalant. people speak of their parents with some emotion in their voice, but all luke knows of hermes is what the myths tell him. he's only ever learned from the man himself that he doesn't care. ] My dad's just a guy in a myth. Kind of hard to be a myth, myself. [ repeating hercules' own quest? it's not really worthy of even a wiki page, nor a mention. ]

[ her heart warms at his words and she feels a sort of bond over what he's saying - wanting to change the past for other people. if she could she would do that, she thinks, if she didn't know what effect it would have on the world and how awfully it would change everything. she would save sirius, remus, james and lily, she would protect professor snape and professor dumbledore, she would make it so no one had to die to keep the world safe. she would make it so her best friend lived a life of happiness instead of one overshadowed by destiny and pain at the hands of people that were supposed to be his family. but, still, she knows that it's impossible. the world isn't meant to be changed, not so literally, and while she can work on making the future better she knows that attempting to go back and change the past would be a foolish mistake, something that she, admittedly, had learned from, having done it once.

that was different, predestined, professor dumbledore had guided her. it didn't make it entirely right, though, and no matter how her heart called for her to try and fix things she knew that it wasn't something she could do. she couldn't ruin their bright futures by meddling in a past that they had experienced and learned from. it was cruel.

but, of course, she has no idea about his future, no idea about the death that's around the corner for him - or has already happened - and all she can do is continue to speak to him with the little background knowledge she has on his life and his world. if her words make a difference, then -- good. good. she could feel proud of that. ]

I understand completely. I... I often thought, what if I went back? What if I went back and saved my best friend's parents, protected them from the death that was their doorstep? But... It's not right. It would change everything and I might not even have a best friend when I came back home. I might be a different person, an ugly one, one I didn't like, and the world wouldn't have learned from the things that my present had. We wouldn't develop and get stronger, and that's a risk no one should be allowed to take. [ she winces as the word almost slips out of his mouth before she shakes her head, leans back, settles against her chair. she almost wants to curl in around herself, the topic of conversation heavy on her heart and her mind. ]

Is it different? I'm fighting against people's expectations of me just as you are. You can't tell me that people see who your father is and don't expect you to act in a particular way, or to express particular beliefs. People see me, a muggleborn, and expect me to be weaker or quieter and I am not because I know, I know, that I am better than they think I am. I'm muggleborn and proud of it, no matter what the world wants to think of it.

[ she shakes her head, leaning forward, forcing her lips into a soft, tender little smile. ]

You know you're not a son of anyone to me, right? You're right, you're not just one person. I honestly wouldn't care if you weren't the child of anyone special. You should be judged on who you are and the choices you make, the things you feel and your actions and regrets, not what blood runs through your veins. To me you're not Luke Castellan, son of Hermes and part of your Greek camp. You're just Luke, my new friend, someone who is going to get terribly bored with all my lectures and scolding.

[ she smiles a little wider. ]

You're you, and that's all you should try to be. Don't let anyone else tell you differently, okay?

[ people look at luke knowing what it is he's done, of his own accord and the manipulation of kronos, and they either shrug their shoulders like nico di angelo, too indifferent and removed to really care; refuse to acknowledge that their new best friend had committed acts not even he can truly forgive himself for, like jason; or continue to greet his presence with a sneer and a threat of a fist to his jaw, like clarisse. no one judges him for how similar or different he is to hermes — things would be simpler if they did. luke only judges himself for following in his father's footsteps by abandoning his family, the catalyst that had sparked the ember of his anger when he'd been younger. like father, like son. ]

[ but luke rubs two of his fingers hard against the bridge of his nose, against the crease of his brows. he feels a headache coming on, with the two sides of him warring with one another. hermione doesn't even know him, yet, she has more faith in him than he has ever had in himself in his entire life. he allows clarisse la rue's words to rule him, calling him a traitor behind his back, as loudly as possible, for all of drabwurld to hear. it's the words he tells himself, too, hearing them spoken aloud, instead. ]

[ there's so many things he could say, like, you don't even know me or you're wrong. despite the desire to challenge her by pitching to her the destruction of the world being at the tips of his fingertips and the deaths of those he had once called family caking his lifelines, he finds the words are gone, as though they had escaped on the surface of his sigh. he hasn't even allowed himself to really admit to any of those from home how heavily it weighs on him, what had transpired because of his desire to teach the gods and lesson and change things. if he were to go back and somehow save may castellan from her fate, as she had never been the woman he had come to know — he's certain of it, with the scenes kronos had let him only get a small slice of, a woman who had once been happy and proud, with green eyes that were clear and not murky — he thinks any ripple effect would be worth it. at least he'd have his mother — but if that meant there'd be no thalia or annabeth … ]

[ hermione has one point luke would concede to, even if he still longs to change too much. the rest about him, though, he'd fight until his second death, but as backbiter isn't in his grip, and he's wrapped in a warm blanket of exhaustion from travelling and fighting drabwurld itself, she's spared a spar. ]

[ fondly, ] You remind me of someone who used to like to lecture me. [ before he had pulled away entirely and lost her completely. annabeth would like hermione, with her no-nonsense outlook and her obvious love for all things academic. brightest witch of her age. she'd get along with the brightest demigod luke's ever met, if she were to ever arrive in drabwurld. ]

[ despite her words and the effect he doesn't want them to have on him, luke doesn't respond, nor fight it, exhausted from his adventures from caer scima to caer glaem. the fight within him has almost dissipated with his tiffs with clarisse and him pushing himself to remain awake when all he wants to do is sleep. if he weren't so exhausted, hermione would be met tit for tat instead of with a white flag — or, more appropriately, luke merely lying on the floor. he sounds — and looks — amused. ] Are you always this friendly with people you've just met? I didn't know it was a witchy thing to know who someone was on the inside with only a few minutes of conversation.

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