eachdraidh | video - unseelie locked;

[ Alice has been trying to draw in her sketchpad for a while now and it's clear from how wrinkled the piece of paper is, that she's tried to draw on it to no avail. It's been erased numerous times. Right beside her are her imp and her rabbit, as always. She's been quiet at the villa, she's locked herself up acting stranger than before. ]

How funny it is when the mind brings so many images and memories that it cannot even transfer onto a sheet of paper. I know what I see, but it cannot go through my fingertips and onto my paper, unlike so many times before.

[ By the tone of her voice, she means more than that. Guarded as ever, Alice will not say what it is, other than she reluctantly places her pencil down on the paper. Art blocks are terrible, and they're more terrible than before. ]

I am sorry... for my absence. Please don't think of me as silly, but I lost a good companion of my mine. My mare. My horse. I took her in after my first battle, when her owner had fallen. I loved her dearly, she was my friend, too, as much as anyone else I know here.

[ Alice says this while trying not to cry. ]

I loathe to think of another animal as a replacement, but seeing as it is a necessity, I have no other choice. She had fallen in battle when I separated from the others.

[ When she went on her rampage after the Jabberwock, though she's not going to say that. Alice just rubs her rabbit's ears instead while looking at her blank paper. ]

I can try and buy one, if needed, if anyone wants to humor me. I know this is a silly request after everything that has happened -- selfish, even. I think it might be best if I left, for a small while, so I can clear my head and be useful again. No good comes of being a shut-in.

[ After all, ever since she came back, she's been acting stranger and much more distant than before. There is more here that she wants to say; she struggles with saying it. ]

I, well- never mind that. Please be well, all of you.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Well, it would just be until you find a horse. [She grins.]

The hard part would be convincing one of them to leave their eggs behind.

Oh, no... that sounds cruel! Taking away a mother chocobo from her eggs.

Yeah...I guess it would be pretty mean.

I only have the three for now.

[Until next week anyway hehe.]

Oh, no, then please don't worry. I'd imagine they would be protective of them like any other mother would with their children.

[ She is still pretty concerned for her, however. ]

Lumina, are you alright?

Huh? [Crap she was being mopey again wasn't she.]

[She puts on one of her big fake smiles and shrugs.]

Hey you know me, I'm always fine!

[ Alice is just as secretive if not more with her state of mind. She won't press. Much. ]

Are you hurt?

Nah. Maybe a little singed but I'm fine. [She leaned her locket back a bit so Alice could check, since she knew she wouldn't believe her.]

Oh, goodness, why are you singed? Were you near fire?

[ There's no evidence of burns, but Alice is still fretting, nonetheless. No physical injuries doesn't account for the mental injuries. ]

No I...[She hesitates, and for a moment that fake smile fades. But only for a moment.]

I was playing with the Jabberwock. Before she was killed. I'm fine though, she ran off once she had her lavender and I didn't manage to catch up to her again.

[ Considering her past with the creature and her state of mind, Alice just stares at her, blank faced. She's too tired to be angry, she's ready to even write this off as a delusion of her mind. ]

You should rest and take care of your animals. Don't press yourself.

[ It's easier for her to gloss over it and distance herself from it as much as possible. It's still too much of a trigger for her to even talk about. ]

[Someone should probably tell lumina about alice's jabberwock issues at some point.]

That's pretty much all I've been doing.

[ Possibly. Right now, Alice is going to shut down at the word of it. ]

And there is nothing wrong with that.

I don't know. [She sighs.]

I feel like I should be doing something else.

That's a normal feeling.

[ That's how she feels, too. ]

But even then, there is no point to force yourself into something if you aren't sure what it is.