[video | locked to Unseelie]

[tacticalturtleneck]

Wait, Unseelie fans. I've got something for you.

It's called....Lacrosse.

Wait, what was that? We've got more important things to worry about?

How about you

SHUT UP

Don't even waste my time with that. This is a direct order from the Queen herself. Who is also extremely hot. The hottest Queen since Queen Elizabeth's younger years who I actually don't know what she looks like but she was the first Queen to come to mind.

Seriously, sign up. I'll supply all the equipment, money, and training so you won't have any excuses. You just have to play and have some fun. If I get a few teams going, hell we can have a tournament and a betting pool to go around.

Huh, you have something else to say? What's Lacrosse good for?

Uh, the glutes for one thing. Who doesn't like a shapely ass? Play Lacrosse and you'll get laid constantly, guaranteed. It's also good for teamwork which means when you tag in a second person, there will be double the pleasure.

Did I mention gambling, because I totally did. You'll totally make out like a Native American (I'm like 1/16th Cherokee so that's not racist).

Oh, yeah, it's an all-age sport. So don't try anything with the kids, sickos.

So who wants to sign up and who wants to recommend team names?

Comments

[scorchedchivalry]

I am certain the paperwork is already in progress, though I doubt she will give you anything you would take as a bribe. [Rin's a bit on the poorish side.]

[tacticalturtleneck]

She's got a lot she could offer as a bribe.

[scorchedchivalry]

Careful, Archer. Remember who you are speaking with.

[tacticalturtleneck]

...it's true though?

[scorchedchivalry]

What she could offer and what she will offer are two very different things. This is not a topic for discussion. Period.

[tacticalturtleneck]

Just color me curious but uh....you're willing to learn Lacrosse, right?

[Not where Saber thought this would go.]

[scorchedchivalry]

...why would I play if I did not know the rules? Rules are important to any competition. I assumed I would be taught how to play.

[tacticalturtleneck]

That much, you can leave to me.

[Rin has bribed him. Unethical but take it up with her.]

You'll be a master and your ass will be perfect when I'm done with you.

[scorchedchivalry]

I was under the impression that my rear was perfect as it was.

[tacticalturtleneck]

Sorry but my rear is what everyone should aspire to be like. Rearly.

[scorchedchivalry]

Even a woman's?

[tacticalturtleneck]

Cop a feel of this assy firmness and you'll understand.

[scorchedchivalry]

I do not think that necessary.

[tacticalturtleneck]

Come on, just once. It'll be like a bro thing. No balls touching, no homo.

1/2

[scorchedchivalry]

I believe we have already established that I am female despite the way I sometimes dress.

[scorchedchivalry]

...what is 'homo'?

[tacticalturtleneck]

Uh, were you listening? It's when balls touch.

When balls touch, things are homo.

[scorchedchivalry]

Am I to assume, then, that lacrosse is homo since there are balls and they most likely touch?

[tacticalturtleneck]

There's only one ball in lacrosse. Big difference. That 's' is pretty critical.

[scorchedchivalry]

...but what if it gets lost? It seems practical to have several balls on hand.

[tacticalturtleneck]

Yeah but they're not touching. Unless you like playing with balls.

Do you like playing with balls, Saber old chap? It's okay, you can come clean to me.

[scorchedchivalry]

It is not something I have particularly indulged in.

[Said completely deadpan.]

[tacticalturtleneck]

Well, I had a moment here and there. But it really wasn't homo, I promise.

[scorchedchivalry]

I am not certain I believe you.

[tacticalturtleneck]

What? No! I'm the most trustworthy person you know, I bet!