[video | locked to Unseelie]

[tacticalturtleneck]

Wait, Unseelie fans. I've got something for you.

It's called....Lacrosse.

Wait, what was that? We've got more important things to worry about?

How about you

SHUT UP

Don't even waste my time with that. This is a direct order from the Queen herself. Who is also extremely hot. The hottest Queen since Queen Elizabeth's younger years who I actually don't know what she looks like but she was the first Queen to come to mind.

Seriously, sign up. I'll supply all the equipment, money, and training so you won't have any excuses. You just have to play and have some fun. If I get a few teams going, hell we can have a tournament and a betting pool to go around.

Huh, you have something else to say? What's Lacrosse good for?

Uh, the glutes for one thing. Who doesn't like a shapely ass? Play Lacrosse and you'll get laid constantly, guaranteed. It's also good for teamwork which means when you tag in a second person, there will be double the pleasure.

Did I mention gambling, because I totally did. You'll totally make out like a Native American (I'm like 1/16th Cherokee so that's not racist).

Oh, yeah, it's an all-age sport. So don't try anything with the kids, sickos.

So who wants to sign up and who wants to recommend team names?

Comments

video; Unseelie locked (because everyone's gon enjoy this probably)

[gandere]

Gambling? [ Can she really bet on this sport? ]

[tacticalturtleneck]

That's what I said. By the way, it's not racist when I say it but it is when you do.

[gandere]

I didn't say anything except the word gambling! [ QUIT CALLING HER RACIST WHERE EVERYONE CAN HEAR. ]

[tacticalturtleneck]

Don't think I'm onto you. You probably put "JAPANESE ONLY" signs in your shop windows. If you even have that.

[gandere]

What kind of business model is that? If I only served coffee to the Japanese, I'd be poor.

[ It's not as if there's enough here to sustain her ideal income. ]

[tacticalturtleneck]

Coffee? Coffee? What are you, some kind of Arab?

[gandere]

No, we've gone through this before. I'm Japanese.

[ Several times. ] Anyway I decided I'm going to create a team that can't be beat.

[ She actually seems pretty confident in this!! ]

[tacticalturtleneck]

Exactly. You're Japanese. Have you given more thought about sleeping with me? I don't care if you're racist or not.

[White privilege.]

Go ahead. I'm going to have to be the one to train them.

[gandere]

No way. I can train them all on my own.

[ She knows what lacrosse is. ] Let's see, first I'll ask the General of the Unseelie since she's soft towards me... then I can probably get Berserker, Saber of Red.

[ Ufufu. ] I'm going to get every Heroic Spirit on my team. We'll be invincible.

[tacticalturtleneck]

The important part there was my first question, asshole!

[gandere]

Oh, that? I thought you were just being ornery and flippant as usual.

I believe having sex would ruin our already professional relationship.

[tacticalturtleneck]

....we had one of those?

[gandere]

We do now that I'm forming a lacrosse team!

[ Too bad, so sad. If he wanted to sleep with her, it should have been before this idea. ]

[tacticalturtleneck]

We can totally hold this off for a couple days. I swear.

[gandere]

It's too late, I've already started forming the invitations to my official team. All work, no play--that's my motto.

[ It's not.

but now she has a convenient excuse to dodge his attempts to bed her. ]

[tacticalturtleneck]

.........fuck you, Lacrosse.

[gandere]

Is it really going to make my ass more shapely? I'm just wondering.

[ RUBS IT IN. ]

[tacticalturtleneck]

.........triple fuck you, Lacrosse.

[Rin has a nice ass, okay????]

[gandere]

Are we sticking to the traditional rules? Ten players?

[ Just making sure as she works on her roster. ]

[tacticalturtleneck]

Yeah, yeah.

[SO DISAPPOINTED OVER HERE.]

[gandere]

Excellent.

... out of curiosity, do you plan to form a team yourself?

[tacticalturtleneck]

Nope. I gotta be a coach and a referee until someone learns the rules.

[gandere]

I'll pay you to coach my team exclusively. No other.

[ She can't afford losing. ]

[Totally here audio]

[chaoticwhimsy]

[Here this, Archer? This is a twelve year old giggling at your failure.]

[tacticalturtleneck]

Oh my god, this isn't The Ring!!!