( one ) text ● seelie & unseelie !

[infame]

So, we've been here long enough to get settled in and be faced with mortal peril. I have to say, being almost eaten and half-terrified really does knock you out at night.

Let's talk transport - who's found something better than horses? I'm talking magic portals. I'll take a bicycle if one's going.

- PH

Comments

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[teenyoda]

What do you mean ALMOST eaten? Couldn't you just have done us all a favor and jumped down its throat?

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[infame]

And here I thought we'd moved past all this hostility.

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[teenyoda]

I'll possibly move past it when you die.

And stay dead.

For good.

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[infame]

I've got no immediate plans to die. I suggest talking to a therapist, Stiles. Are you REALLY angry with me or are you frustrated with how much more fetching I am?

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[teenyoda]

What was that? You want to play fetch?

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[infame]

With your head.

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[teenyoda]

Was that a Peter joke? Or were you referencing my dick? Because I'm sorry, but that's already been spoken for by a Hale.

[Oops.]

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[infame]

Please tell me you're joking. Please tell me it's not Derek - I've been holding onto hope for his taste.

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[teenyoda]

No, not joking. No, not Derek. Eww. I have better taste than that.

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[infame]

There is absolutely no way it is Cora. Did you dream this?

[peter, we got real bad news for you buddy. ]

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[teenyoda]

No, not Cora. No, didn't dream it. Very, very real. At least you did one good thing with your life. ;)

[It's probably a good thing the castles are so far apart...]

Text LMFAO CHRIST

[infame]

[ten whole minutes of silence as slow, awful realization hits]

No.

Text NO REGRETS

[teenyoda]

Oh yes.

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[infame]

[STILES MET HIS DAUGHTER BEFORE HE DID, WELCOME TO THE SHIT LIST SON. ]

No, you didn't.

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[teenyoda]

[He did more than meet her, daddy.]

Oh. I did. Two cards got punched that night.

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[infame]

I'm going to eviscerate you, Stilinski.

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[teenyoda]

Been there, done that. Got the scar already. Also got a few scars on my back from one very attractive werecoyote. Meow, Peter.

Text 1/SO MANY

[infame]

[SUCH EMOTION SO MANY ]

I take it back. I'm going to have Derek eviscerate you.

Text 2/omfg i dk ill let you know

[infame]

Werecoyote's don't meow, you insufferable idiot. Stop ruining my daughters reputation with your slanderous lies.

Text ok done

[infame]

She's a werecoyote????

Text YOU SURE?

[teenyoda]

She makes a lot of nice sounds. It's hard to tell what's a meow and what's a-- well, I'll bet you know since you kind of had a hand in making her. WINK WINK.

Text YEAH PRETTY SURE

[infame]

One has to wonder just how the Sheriff's son turned out to be such a revolting little ass.

Text OKAY THEN

[teenyoda]

Practice. Weren't you the one who wanted to turn me into one of your little wolfpack? Pretty sure you don't get to complain just because I joined the family a different way.

Speaking of joining the family, too bad I'm not back there. I wanted to ask her if werecoyotes could get pregnant from humans.

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[infame]

Stiles, we both know antagonizing me won't end well. For you.

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[teenyoda]

What's the matter? Worried I'll make a prettier baby?

That might be hard, but with what we've got to work with... anything's possible.

[Not that Stiles actually believed Malia was... with child or anything, but the idea of having something to hold over Peter like this... It tickled him. He loved it. He wished he could rub it in his stupid smug face.]