eachdraidh | video » (unseelie locked)

[ The room is pink. Pink, gold, and are those fluffy, clever bunnies-the-size-of-imps running around adjusting the statues? Might be. ]

Hey! Goddess of Love speaking! Pay attention. [ She's curvaceous, tall, and dressed in enough chiffon that you'd think physics would keep her covered up, and yet. ] Hi-iiii. My name is Aphrodite, you might know me by a bunch of other things.

Obviously this place is like Ares's wet dream with all the war biz going on, but that's not my jam. Love would be the name of my game. Problem is, I don't have anywhere for mortals to leave messages for me when I'm busy and I am so not answering calls for help on this locket indefinitely because, uh, I have a life, so here's the deal; build me a temple near the edge of Dorchadas and I'll give you a freebie. That babe you've had your eye on? I'll make them fall in love with you! Are you ugly as a toad? I'll give you a permanent make-over! This is a one-time thing because I'm feeling generous ... and clearly don't have any offerings coming in, ugh. Speaking of, if you want to leave cute shoes as a gift, I'm a size six.

So yeah! Get in touch.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

...Is love really what we ought to be concerned with right now?

[War is something Balem can handle well enough. Love? That's a different story.]

What else are you going to jerk off to, the sound of people complaining? Little weird.

I'm not going to -

[He doesn't even want to say 'jerk off'. So he just pauses awkwardly.]

I think the war and the fact that we're trapped here are far greater concerns. Romantic and carnal interests can wait.

[ A snort. ]

Hey, if that Solais chick could bang the Reul guy, I bet things would be a lot more relaxed around here, that's all I'm saying.

Perhaps it would, but I doubt romantic entanglements between shardbearers would accomplish much.

Uh huh, and when was the last time you got laid? I'm thinking it was a while ago, if you're talking like that.

I'm far too busy for anything like that. And I'm not particularly interested in it right now.

[Oh, if only his brother were here, he'd likely get a kick out of this conversation.]

And even if I were, I'm too old for anyone here.

[ The most genuinely pitying look of the day, he has won it. ]

You know, if you need to hash out that stuff? I talked to this other virgin too, she came right out of her shell. I could help?

I'm fifty thousand years old, do you really think I haven't ever...

[Wait, nope, this is not a good topic of conversation to be having here. Or anywhere.]

I don't believe that's anyone's business but my own.

[ Clucking her tongue and pulling a face. ]

I dunno, I heard that sort of thing can come back.

[He turns away slightly, voice even shakier than usual.]

I assure you I have no romantic troubles of any sort. I just think we have bigger concerns right now.

I don't think so. [ Her tone softens a little after hearing the tremor in his. ] Are you okay?

I'm fine.

[Wow he really misses the days when people actually regarded him with fear and respect.]

I'm not used to such unprofessional discussion topics. Nonetheless, I think the enemy may get the best of us if we spend too much time looking for love.

Not if they're in love with us. [ Being all about emotions and love (the good, the bad, and the very ugly) makes her a so-so tactician. ] If they wanted to lick our boots all the time, there wouldn't be a war and we'd have babes all over us.

You do not love your enemies, you destroy them.

[Or you try to crush their businesses, which in Balem's world is basically the same thing as killing them if they can't afford eternal youth anymore.]

...Has anyone actually built you a shrine?

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