Sterling Archer (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
tacticalturtleneck) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
eachdraidh2015-05-05 01:16 am
tacticalturtleneck) wrote in eachdraidh2015-05-05 01:16 am
Entry tags:
- arno dorian: assassin's creed,
- billy kaplan: marvel 616,
- ellie: the last of us,
- hiro hamada: big hero 6,
- isabela: dragon age,
- jason todd: dc comics,
- javik: mass effect,
- loki: marvel 616,
- lumina: ffxiii:lr,
- rin tohsaka: fate/stay night,
- saber of red: fate/apocrypha,
- sterling archer: archer,
- the outsider: dishonored,
- vanessa ives: penny dreadful
video; unseelie only
Alright, let's get a couple facts straight.
1st -> Fuck the Seelie. Yeah, which one of you asses are going to argue with me about that? It'll be a quick trip to the dungeons for you, King Louis XVI. That's spelled L-o-u-i-s but pronounced in a dumb frog way. Don't get me started.
2nd -> Get your ass over to Archer Point Military Academy. Seriously, learn how to be a good soldier. Girls love soldiers which means you can get some serious bed action as long as you follow what I say.
3rd -> Don't disrespect Darth Wark. He's my chocobro and I will let him remove you from existence if you do. Bros before does, right? [Yes, there is a loud WARK off the screen.] Are girl chocobos called does by the way? I don't even know. Quick, someone find me a bird expert!
4th -> All hot women drink for free here. Considering there is an extreme lack of unhot women using these things, I'm pretty sure that means all of you. Using my bed while I'm in it is also free, hint hint. Psst, that means I'd bang you.
What else am I missing? Fill me in.
1st -> Fuck the Seelie. Yeah, which one of you asses are going to argue with me about that? It'll be a quick trip to the dungeons for you, King Louis XVI. That's spelled L-o-u-i-s but pronounced in a dumb frog way. Don't get me started.
2nd -> Get your ass over to Archer Point Military Academy. Seriously, learn how to be a good soldier. Girls love soldiers which means you can get some serious bed action as long as you follow what I say.
3rd -> Don't disrespect Darth Wark. He's my chocobro and I will let him remove you from existence if you do. Bros before does, right? [Yes, there is a loud WARK off the screen.] Are girl chocobos called does by the way? I don't even know. Quick, someone find me a bird expert!
4th -> All hot women drink for free here. Considering there is an extreme lack of unhot women using these things, I'm pretty sure that means all of you. Using my bed while I'm in it is also free, hint hint. Psst, that means I'd bang you.
What else am I missing? Fill me in.
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Hey, hey. Spoiler alert. You kill your King and get an Emperor. Isn't that ridiculously ironic?
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[THE AMOUNT OF DEADPAN HE HAS ON HIS END RIGHT NOW.]
I'd like to say I was surprised, but this is the Drabwurld, and it's taught me that anything is possible. Even back home.
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[OKAY HE'S EVEN MORE LOST NOW]