video; unseelie only

[tacticalturtleneck]

Alright, let's get a couple facts straight.

1st -> Fuck the Seelie. Yeah, which one of you asses are going to argue with me about that? It'll be a quick trip to the dungeons for you, King Louis XVI. That's spelled L-o-u-i-s but pronounced in a dumb frog way. Don't get me started.

2nd -> Get your ass over to Archer Point Military Academy. Seriously, learn how to be a good soldier. Girls love soldiers which means you can get some serious bed action as long as you follow what I say.

3rd -> Don't disrespect Darth Wark. He's my chocobro and I will let him remove you from existence if you do. Bros before does, right? [Yes, there is a loud WARK off the screen.] Are girl chocobos called does by the way? I don't even know. Quick, someone find me a bird expert!

4th -> All hot women drink for free here. Considering there is an extreme lack of unhot women using these things, I'm pretty sure that means all of you. Using my bed while I'm in it is also free, hint hint. Psst, that means I'd bang you.

What else am I missing? Fill me in.

Comments

[selfimage]

Every number is considered something somewhere. I call moot.

It still dances at the edge of boring. Well, unless we're talking about the free drinks. You're still doing those, right?

[tacticalturtleneck]

Have you ever even been to Archer Point? We're all about the drinking and partying.

[selfimage]

How did I miss it during all the tavern hopping?

[tacticalturtleneck]

Uh....missing the forest because you're looking at the trees?

[selfimage]

And a charming face, apparently. How sad for me.

All right. I'll take your mortal party.

[tacticalturtleneck]

You're supposed to add 'no homo' to the end of that statement. [Not that it would matter.] Or 'no momo' or however you shorten mortal. Seriously, what is up with that?

[selfimage]

I'm afraid you're mistaken—is it "all the homo" or "all the momo"? I can't be certain.

[tacticalturtleneck]

Not quite sure.....

...I'll admit to being a little lost here.

[selfimage]

[ he sounds a tad amused. ]

I don't have objections to either.

[tacticalturtleneck]

[GIVE HIM A MOMENT.

Mostly to chug more rum. It is happening.]

I think I need to be more drunk for this.

[selfimage]

I'll accompany you with the steady mantra of "chug."

[tacticalturtleneck]

If you're going to do that, you need to be here. And have your own bottle.