eachdraidh | video | open to both courts

[ John is in a stranger position than he's usually in when he makes broadcasts. Sprawled out on his stomach on the floor, locket in front of his face, he looks- not relaxed, but at the very least less active than he usually is. On his back rests the head and front paws of his female saber-fanged cave lion, her toes flexing every once in a while as if she's kneading his back.

There's a loud sigh. ]

God damn, but this place makes me feel old sometimes. I'm in my thirties and here we all get triple the lifespan -- I'm way too young for this. Don't know how you elves and other long-lived people do it.

[ Granted, with his enhancements, John may very well be long-lived even without the lifespan boost of the Drabwurld... but that's not the point. ]

Of course, this could be part of what happens when you join the military at seventeen and see several lifetimes of war stretch out in front of you. Not that I assume the life expectancy for most shardbearers is that high...

[ And he's being morbid. He grimaces- and then swears again. ]

Buttercup, watch your claws!

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[ ... there's.

silence.

for a long moment, as korra tries to let that sink in. ]

You... what?

[ at least she doesn't sound mad? just baffled. ]

[ John just shrugs as much as someone can shrug while laying chest-first on the ground with a giant kittyweasel on them. ]

Yeah.

[ usually, her first instinct would be to get mad, to think that john didn't trust her to do this all on her own — yell about how little he must think of her because it's an insult to her pride. this was her task. she had to do this all on her own.

and while there is a little rash of annoyance that rubs against her mind, for once she doesn't react in her normal knee-jerk fashion. there's more than just herself at work here, more people that care about mako and what makes him, him, and for once she's realizing that. no longer is it just team avatar against the world — there are more lives that have become entangled within her own, her team's, her world's too, likely.

so she's quiet, trying to let this just... sink in. ]

... Why?

Why wouldn't I?

[ John has tried for so long not to get too close to people. It's completely failed in the Drabwurld and Korra is a big part of the reason why. She pulls people in, a planet who attracts everything and anything smaller, tugging them along with sheer gravity.

And yet she doesn't quite seem to realize it. John's not sure, suddenly, if she's realized how big of a deal their family-friendship is to him, for him. ]

[ and that little detail right there, the one about how korra doesn't realize the impact she has — it's sadly, unfortunately, true. most of the time she can only see her failings laid bare in front of her, all the opportunities she's had to do the right thing and all the ways she's messed them up. she knows she has the power of worlds, but she feels like she should be wiser, that she should know things when asked, should just know the world already.

and because she was confined in a compound for her whole life until finally running away at age seventeen, she has a more difficult time reading the people around her. in her opinion, they're the amazing ones for sticking by her after all that she's done. tenzin never gave up faith in her, even after she dismissed him as her teacher; mako and bolin could have had better lives as a cop and an actor respectively, yet they jumped at the chance to help her out when she asked. it amazes her, in those times when she can look without herself and let the details sink in, that these people would put their lives on the line for her. consistently.

that's why she has to protect them.

and john — he's had to put up with so much from her, from her quipping on the battlefield to dragging him into a great big mess that she didn't mean to let spiral out of control. he was the first person she could talk to about how frightened she was about facing the consequences of what she did, and even then, he never gave up faith in her.

she's quiet for a long while, eyes trained down at her hands. then, she draws in a deep breath, her eyes unnaturally bright for a moment. ]

Where are you?

You're not going to punch me, are you?

[ It's a joke, because as much as John cares for her and the rest of his kids, as much faith as he has in them (and it's about the only thing he does have faith in -- his people, their hearts, their desire to do what's right and to look out for each other) he's not so great at this whole emotions thing. It's easier when he can fall into the role of the brother, the father; when he can use actions instead of words, like tugging a blanket up over a girl who's tired because this world has done its very best to beat her down.

But there's real concern there, too. Maybe she doesn't want his help. Maybe she doesn't want him, wants John Grimm out of her life, and as far as he's concerned -- who could blame her? He's a tired old Marine, best for the sidelines. ]

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