EACHDRAIDH

[ The face that comes onscreen after a few obvious jostles might be one you're familiar with (if you are, sorry, he's probably not the one you're looking for). Johnny's half-concerned, half-amused with the general state of things and it shows in the way he's looking into the locket, clearing his throat. ]

Ever wonder how this feels like some weird State of the Union address? Except with a lot less people. Or maybe it's like making a YouTube video. Here I am, talking to you guys, and I can't even see your faces. [ He shrugs. ] Oh, well -- anyway.

What's up, strangers of Drabwurld? I have three questions: [ Holds up one finger. ] one, why is it called Drabwurld? Did its founders hate being here, or does Brightworld just not have the same ring to it? Ha, there's your thought of the day.

[ Two fingers. ] Two: Anyone seen a big orange walking rockpile lately? Grumpy, looks like he lost a bet with a mudslide? Failing that, how about a guy who can stretch to grossly disproportionate levels, or a girl who can turn invisible? If found, let me know; they can be pretty ornery, and reach dangerous levels of boring when put together for too long.

Three, and I can't believe this didn't come first. It's a very important question, so I'm gonna need all of you to be honest with me, whoever you are.

[ He leans closer to the screen, loses the smile and gets serious. This is crucial. ]

Which side's got the hotter babes? The Seelie, or the Unseelie?