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[nowthatsfunny]

Okay, I get it. [ Tess' tone is brusque, cool, almost flippant. She feels fucking weird talking into a locket, of all things, but it's been a long damn time since she's had anything like a phone, so hey, might as well try this out, right? ] This place is magic. Fairies, trolls, goblins, whatever. You have 'em. Like some kind of fucking fairy tale. [ She honestly isn't sure what to believe right now, so she's getting right to the point. ] I just have one question for you. Cordyceps. Have you heard of it? And more importantly, is it here?

[ Tess glances aside for a moment, her eyes flashing with - fear, maybe. Not that she would ever admit that. ] Because I can live with magic and shit if there's no infection to worry about.

[ Whatever 'living' might entail here, anyway. ]

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[nowthatsfunny]

[ Damn, this guy is nothing if not persistent. Pretty much the only way she could project more "fuck off, asshole" would be to actually say "fuck off, asshole".

That's either extreme obtuseness or extreme stubbornness, or both. ]

In case you haven't noticed, I'm really not interested in small talk.

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[fakers]

[ oh, he's definitely picked that up. he just doesn't care. no, if anything, he wants to see how long he can go before she completely snaps. he likes to live dangerously. ]

Oh? Strange, you didn't give that impression at all. Unfortunately, as you'll soon learn, this place is rather obsessed with small talk. You won't be able to get far without it.

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[nowthatsfunny]

[ Eyeroll. ]

I'm sure I'll make do.

[ How does she turn this thing off again? Eh, who cares. She just snaps it shut, assuming that'll do it. ]