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[nowthatsfunny]

Okay, I get it. [ Tess' tone is brusque, cool, almost flippant. She feels fucking weird talking into a locket, of all things, but it's been a long damn time since she's had anything like a phone, so hey, might as well try this out, right? ] This place is magic. Fairies, trolls, goblins, whatever. You have 'em. Like some kind of fucking fairy tale. [ She honestly isn't sure what to believe right now, so she's getting right to the point. ] I just have one question for you. Cordyceps. Have you heard of it? And more importantly, is it here?

[ Tess glances aside for a moment, her eyes flashing with - fear, maybe. Not that she would ever admit that. ] Because I can live with magic and shit if there's no infection to worry about.

[ Whatever 'living' might entail here, anyway. ]

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[nowthatsfunny]

No shit. I wasn't aware of pigs flying, either.

[playmakings]

Just answering your question, ma'am.

[nowthatsfunny]

Jesus Christ, don't call me that! It makes me sound like a grandmother.

[ She scoffs and rolls her eyes. ]

My name is Tess.

[playmakings]

I thought--I mean, manners... [ The last bit trails off, mumbled,and she sort of feels like sinking into her seat. ]

Tess. Okay, Tess. If it helps any, you get used to the magic thing, a little bit.

[nowthatsfunny]

I really, really doubt it.

[ Given that right now she can't even figure out if she's alive or dead, in heaven, hell, or some wacky hallucination, somehow she really doubts it. ]