First Stanza - [Video] (both courts)

[deadpoet]

[The locket opens up to showing him in a bar. It's a well run place that seems fairly busy. Spike can be heard over the conversations in the background, but only just. Behind him is a pig-faced bartender who is probably less than pleased by a locket conversation in his bar, but hasn't gone to the trouble of turning it off. Spike hasn't been causing much trouble in Daonna since he arrived weeks ago to start living medieval style. He patrolled with the Slayer and though beasties weren't always common, there was no shortage of crime. It was work that didn't always pay well, but they'd collected one bounty that was keeping them fed and a roof over their head at the Sweet Sow.

And when he was peckish... well, the town was full of people that would never be missed, so long as they were never found. Spike was glad to be back on human blood again.]

This boon business is a big load of bollocks and I can't be the only one who thinks it. Collecting feathers for the king and queen? Here we are, shards rammed into our chests, and this is the best use they have for us? Bugger that and bugger them as well. Bootlicking might suit others, but it's never been the life for me, no matter what Crackerjack prizes they're offering.

So what I want to know is where we can get our goods without kissing their royal asses? There's got to be some witch or demon or the like handing out discount boons for a fee. Anything will do: it's got to be better than the cheap shite they threw at me last time. [A pouch of tobacco! For dealing with shadow beasties! Is it any wonder he didn't bother bending down to pick any feathers up?]

Comments

[chaoticwhimsy]

Mm. It helps to be complicated. [She giggles.]

So why do adults let kids ask some old creep for presents?

[deadpoet]

Because they did the same thing when they were tots. When it comes to humans, the one thing they never do is get any wiser.

[chaoticwhimsy]

They're supposed to, though. [Not that they do.]

So does he give people want they ask for?

[deadpoet]

Never. The parents have to go fetch all the presents to keep the little tots from being disappointed.

[chaoticwhimsy]

So. [Give her a moment.] A bunch of kids as a creepy guy for gifts, and then their parents go buy them and...say the creepy guy got them?

[deadpoet]

There you are. You've learned the meaning of Christmas and you didn't even need a thirty minute special for it. Bravo.

[chaoticwhimsy]

You know that half the stuff you say makes no sense, right Spike?

[deadpoet]

Of course it makes sense. Plenty of sense. You're just not old enough to work it out yet, that's all.

[chaoticwhimsy]

You know age doesn't actually make people smarter, right?

Some of the stupidest people I know are adults.

[deadpoet]

All the stupid people I know are adults.

[But then he knows like... two kids. Her and Dawn.]

[chaoticwhimsy]

[Best kids to know, really.]

See? So stop calling kids dumb.

[deadpoet]

Well I never said they were dumb, did I? Just that they're not very clever. Bit of a difference there, tot.