(third stake) video ✧ unseelie only

[herotypical]

[ bless her, she comes from a time before the selfie was adequately popularized. and yet buffy summers seems to have an instinctive knack for propped her locket up on her palm and holding it just so -- capturing her own ennui-stamped face in one corner and (over her shoulder) introducing the world to pretty little winter-blanketed river scene. one might assume she's in the vicinity of land carved out for his baronliness archer's spire and forts. hah. spire and forts. hello, innuendo.

anyway. she exhales with a puff of her cheeks and stares down the locket. you'd almost think there was no war at all by how little attention she pays it. purposefully, buffy seems to be ignoring the court drama as best she can. running away -- sour, perhaps, for a number of reasons. ] Some of you might've met-chatted-made-buddies with a girl named Dawn. She's gone. Sorry about that. [ and presumably that's why buffy looks like she's been mainlining angst straight into her veins.

otherwise: ] I need hammers. And...probably nails. Power drills will also be appreciated but I hear that might be a bit of a pipe-dream. We could also probably use pipes. I think.

See. This is why you gotta hate a war economy.

Oh! Those really really really big iron bar things. You know, the ones with the thin middles and the wide edges. The ones that co-star in all the wacky old school cool photoshoots hanging over city skylines...

[ but at least she's still bothering to help build unseelie fortifications. she's not ready to sally forth and kill, yet.

buffy's rambling. she tries to stop. except-- ] Wait! A few more things. Which one of you mooks is Professor Spaniard? The rest of you...I dunno -- be careful out there.
[ she went there. ]

Comments

2/2

[herotypical]

-- Hey, do you think one of the river forts should have a skylight?

[ because she thinks so. ]

[tacticalturtleneck]

[Passing it on.]

Uh....is this like a tanning thing? Or a thing that hangs out over the river and you dump people in it down a hole like a toilet. Because I'm really liking the last one.

[herotypical]

A skylight? Nnnno. [ exhale. ] It's a window. In the ceiling. It's for natural light and suave interior décor and a...

Wait. You want your forts to have trap doors? [ that is actually kinda cool. ]

[tacticalturtleneck]

I guess...it's okay? But I'm not gonna approve any design until you show how you're going to keep people from climbing up there and breaking it to jump in.

[He's not actually this tactically minded. He's just imagining how his mom would try to get in if she had to be sneaky and not a naggy bitch.]

Uh, yeah? We're gonna do this better than everyone else.

[herotypical]

Better. Than everyone else. You mean -- all the everyone elses who so very obviously outclass us in things like, uhm, being really really medieval? Or probably knowing how to make mortar?

[ ... ] I don't know how we're gonna do this without a power drill. Or hard hats. Add hard hats to the list. I look cute in a hard hat.

[tacticalturtleneck]

Oh, oh, oh! I've got an idea for this! You ever heard of the sai? That weird looking Japanese weapon.

[herotypical]

Fun fact: it's not even Japanese. I mean -- okay, not originally. The Japanese might have perfected it but...

[ wait. this was tip-toeing rapidly into that knows-way-too-much-about-ancient-weaponry corner again. buffy pulls herself up short with a gruff: ] What about'em?

[tacticalturtleneck]

They're also good to use to hold roofs to corners of a building. Think about it....you need a weapon and you just reach up the side of the nearest house and BAM. Sword users are fucked.

[herotypical]

-- You want our roofing to include weaponry. You want trap doors and you want roof-weapons. I...

You realize I'm too short to just reach up the side of the nearest anything, right?

[ because that's the real problem with this. yep. ]

[tacticalturtleneck]

I got an idea. How about you get taller and stop complaining? This isn't rocket science.

[herotypical]

I can't just grow on command. [ TRUST HER SHE'S TRIED. ]

I am game for fudging up some blade-wielders, though. [ she'd rather take a bruise than a slice. ] I dunno. We could...give it a try. You're sure it won't look too funny? Just -- sai handles sticking out of the woodwork?

You don't think they'd notice?

[tacticalturtleneck]

Have you seen the people over there in Seelie? Someone needs to boon them in a shortbus. Just saying.

[herotypical]

How many Seelies have you even ever met?

[ because she's only spoken to like...two. ]

[tacticalturtleneck]

I beat up one. Does that count?

[herotypical]

Did you take his lunch money, too?

[tacticalturtleneck]

I took his locket. Because it technically belongs to Unseelie.

[herotypical]

Wait -- seriously? The guy had one of ours?

[tacticalturtleneck]

He was a traitor. Apparently, that actually happens.

[herotypical]

Of course it happens. You're a spy, right? Shouldn't you know these things?

[ someone's always betraying someone. ]

[tacticalturtleneck]

I try to repress those memories, thank you!!

[He said it wasn't his real name ;A;]

[herotypical]

Has anyone ever told you that you don't exactly...inspire a great deal of confidence? Y'know -- as a commander or. Well. Otherwise.

[tacticalturtleneck]

Has any ever told you that I don't care? Because I don't, if you didn't take the hint!

Besides, Professor Spaniard, in his amazing opinion, says this place needs more people like me.

[herotypical]

Ah. Professor Spaniard.

He and I had a lovely little chat. You know -- he's not even Spanish. Not even Portuguese.

[tacticalturtleneck]

Shut up, Buffy!

[herotypical]

Asshole.

[ what a productive work environment. ]