✈ fifth snowy flight ❄ — video (both courts)

[winterwork]

[The locket seems to be set up on a counter in a bedroom in the Station. To the side of the screen, there appears to be a small miniature ice sculpture of a pine tree, sparkling from the glow of the fireplace in the far background. Jack makes final adjustments in angling the locket just right to show off his crystal art project as well as his own smirking face.]

Alright, there's a whole ton of you out there that are either old and ancient or from some weird world that never got to know the cool Earth holidays, so lucky you — I'm here to provide you with a little Q&A on what Christmas is.

It doesn’t make any sense. It’s Father Christmas’s birthday but … not his birthday, too? Why is he giving out gifts for some other guy? [ OH, LOOK, one confused Viking is sitting on the bed. Hiccup gestures animatedly. ] Jack, your gods aren’t making any sense, even Loki’s more organised than this.

[The winter spirit rolls his eyes, waving a hand to hush the man behind him, keeping his attention on the locket instead of addressing him.]

The point is: you set up a ton of colorful lights around, you toss up a big tree to get sap all over your fingers, and then you find presents underneath it on the morning of the 25th. [That’s about the gist of it, right?] Look, I’m not big on bribing kids with gifts, but it does get people slacking off from all that serious crap so they can run outside and make a snowman or something. Gotta give it props for that.

So, basically, it’s Snoggletog without Thor. [ Flatly voiced from the peanut gallery. ] Boy, does that sound like a hoot.

No, no. [He finally turns his back to face Hiccup, shaking a pointed finger at him.] Don’t compare it to your aggressive “missing toes” Viking catastrophe of a holiday. [Turning back to the locket:] Just to be clear — mistletoe, that little plant that’s hung up everywhere on ceilings during the month, means you kiss the person you’re caught under it with — it’s not for punching them, as some people believe.

[ Wow, Hiccup’s just going to fold his arms right now. So rude. ]

I could always dredge up the will to punch you, if you’re getting tired of hanging out under mistletoe and suffering the other option.

[ No, he couldn’t. But he can say he might!! ]

Uh huh, sure. [With a momentary deadpan expression, Jack finally just shrugs with a sigh.] Anyway, I know the guy who hands out the presents, been in his secret lair in the North Pole and everything, so if you want to know more about elves — the small critter-like ones who don’t actually wrap the presents — or yetis, caroling and eggnog, whatever, I can fill in all the blanks for you.

[A pause before he adds:] Just do me a favor, be a pal, and run out to play in the snow for a bit, got it?

Excuse you, I am known for my incredibly artistic Snow Furies, Jack. Just because I don’t go prancing around yelling about how great winter is doesn’t mean I don’t know how to have fun.

First of all, I was talking to them, not you. Second, winter is great and I don’t think you understand how—

I’m Jack Frost, I can’t help kissing aaaall the snowflakes because I’m in love with them—

[The bickering continues for however long. Interruptions for questions would be more than welcome at this point.]

Comments

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[smithwork]

Indeed, sir, indeed.

[ Sagely nodding. ]

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[mixcds]

Congratulations.

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[smithwork]

You can have him next time.

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[winterwork]

[Just this look. HE'S NOT SOME PLAY THING TO TOSS AROUND.]

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[smithwork]

Under the mistletoe! That's what I meant. 'Cause there's so much of it!

[ ... Is explaining that not helping his case? Weird. ]

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[winterwork]

Just because you caught me under there once doesn't mean you get to choose where I go next.

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[smithwork]

I never said you couldn't fool about under the mistletoe with whoever you wanted. Knock yourself out.

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[winterwork]

I didn't think I couldn't. I'm just saying who I fool around with isn't up to you.

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[smithwork]

I don't really want to be part of a conversation regarding where you see fit to put your mouth, Jack.

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[winterwork]

Then don't go around handing it off to whoever.

[SNAPS THAT LOCKET SHUT.]

[smithwork]

[ Glances up from the locket and STARES ACROSS THE SAME ROOM AT HIM. ]

[winterwork]

[Pretends to be OH SO SURPRISED TO SEE HIM.]

Oh. I forgot you were here.

[smithwork]

[ Urrrrrgh, here goes nothing while Jack does That Thing. ]

I was joking because the mistletoe's everywhere and it's really likely you'll run into someone else under it, not because I thought I could palm you off on them.

[winterwork]

You really don't have to explain it, Hic. I can handle mistletoe.

[smithwork]

Well, I'm sorry anyway, even if you don't need to hear it, because you seem sort of annoyed with me and I definitely didn't want that.

[ He brushes down his pants as he rises from the bed, gesturing to the door. ]

I'm gonna grab something to eat. Can I get you anything?

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[mixcds]

I'm not sure you quite understand the concept of tact, Hiccup.

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[winterwork]

Thank you. [At least someone has courtesy. Figures it's the dead guy.]

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[smithwork]

Tact about what? We didn't get married, we just kissed.

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[mixcds]

You don't pass people around like a spliff, Hiccup.

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[smithwork]

Like a what? Okay, I'm fairly sure I wasn't going to let anyone have Jack, on a serious note. Spliffs or not.

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[mixcds]

Ask a girl called Effy, apparently she might have some.

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[smithwork]

I don't think I want any, thank you.

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[mixcds]

Probably a good choice, what with the dragon and dead friends.

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[smithwork]

You guys aren't dead, you're ... using up your extra lives, is all. Even the breathing people who come here are sometimes dead in their own world, so this is their second life too. You're just ahead of the game.

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[mixcds]

Hiccup that's sweet, but I am literally a corpse. I'm making peace with the busted nerve-endings and the constant state of being cold.