eachdraidh | ✈ fifth snowy flight ❄

[The locket seems to be set up on a counter in a bedroom in the Station. To the side of the screen, there appears to be a small miniature ice sculpture of a pine tree, sparkling from the glow of the fireplace in the far background. Jack makes final adjustments in angling the locket just right to show off his crystal art project as well as his own smirking face.]

Alright, there's a whole ton of you out there that are either old and ancient or from some weird world that never got to know the cool Earth holidays, so lucky you — I'm here to provide you with a little Q&A on what Christmas is.

It doesn’t make any sense. It’s Father Christmas’s birthday but … not his birthday, too? Why is he giving out gifts for some other guy? [ OH, LOOK, one confused Viking is sitting on the bed. Hiccup gestures animatedly. ] Jack, your gods aren’t making any sense, even Loki’s more organised than this.

[The winter spirit rolls his eyes, waving a hand to hush the man behind him, keeping his attention on the locket instead of addressing him.]

The point is: you set up a ton of colorful lights around, you toss up a big tree to get sap all over your fingers, and then you find presents underneath it on the morning of the 25th. [That’s about the gist of it, right?] Look, I’m not big on bribing kids with gifts, but it does get people slacking off from all that serious crap so they can run outside and make a snowman or something. Gotta give it props for that.

So, basically, it’s Snoggletog without Thor. [ Flatly voiced from the peanut gallery. ] Boy, does that sound like a hoot.

No, no. [He finally turns his back to face Hiccup, shaking a pointed finger at him.] Don’t compare it to your aggressive “missing toes” Viking catastrophe of a holiday. [Turning back to the locket:] Just to be clear — mistletoe, that little plant that’s hung up everywhere on ceilings during the month, means you kiss the person you’re caught under it with — it’s not for punching them, as some people believe.

[ Wow, Hiccup’s just going to fold his arms right now. So rude. ]

I could always dredge up the will to punch you, if you’re getting tired of hanging out under mistletoe and suffering the other option.

[ No, he couldn’t. But he can say he might!! ]

Uh huh, sure. [With a momentary deadpan expression, Jack finally just shrugs with a sigh.] Anyway, I know the guy who hands out the presents, been in his secret lair in the North Pole and everything, so if you want to know more about elves — the small critter-like ones who don’t actually wrap the presents — or yetis, caroling and eggnog, whatever, I can fill in all the blanks for you.

[A pause before he adds:] Just do me a favor, be a pal, and run out to play in the snow for a bit, got it?

Excuse you, I am known for my incredibly artistic Snow Furies, Jack. Just because I don’t go prancing around yelling about how great winter is doesn’t mean I don’t know how to have fun.

First of all, I was talking to them, not you. Second, winter is great and I don’t think you understand how—

I’m Jack Frost, I can’t help kissing aaaall the snowflakes because I’m in love with them—

[The bickering continues for however long. Interruptions for questions would be more than welcome at this point.]

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[That is probably the best way to describe what's happening right now, and it's obvious that he's more than surprised that a giant lizard-with-wings is trying to get some screen-time too. Buddy you are way, way bigger than Mako's tiny dragon.]

Right, why didn't I think of that. [He's not sure what he wants to ask first, and while he's talking to Hiccup he's also kind of eyeballing Toothless.] So wait if you guys don't celebrate Christmas what is there? Yuletide? [Merida had mentioned Yule, maybe Hiccup follows those rules.]

[ Mako's cute dragon is a pipsqueak. A darling, but Terrible Terror sized at best. ]

Snoggletog. Why we chose such a stupid name is beyond me, but there you have it. We all get drunk and exchange gifts but it's not really much at all like Christmas. There are no fat guys putting things in stockings, unless you count my dad putting goodies in my helmet sometimes in the place of Thor.

[He opens his mouth and immediately closes it the minute Hiccup says he doesn't know why the stupid name exists. At least he's acknowledging it's a stupid name. On the other hand…?]

Doesn't sound any different than some of the Christmas parties at my parents' country club, actually. [But apparently it's more acceptable because they're drunk on champagne and wine.]

I don't know, I guess it kinda counts. What does Thor have to do with Snoggletog though? Like…Thor's your version of Santa?

Uh, no. Thor is the god of thunder and lightning, he's the patron deity of my home, Berk. We're Vikings, so we have a whole plethora of crazy gods, but he's the best one.

No I know, I mean. [Sigh. Never mind, Hiccup, ignore him. Now he just has this image of Thor wielding his hammer and a santa hat. No big. There's also the fact that Hiccup doesn't exactly look like a viking, but at least he's polite enough not to say so. He has a dragon. That's apparently a prerequisite.] Why's he the best? Or is it just bias?

Probably just bias. My home is very Huargh! Argh! Muscles and Yak-Lifting and being as burly as a bear. Berkians tend to be loud, stupid and yet more loud on top of that.

Also, Thor's awesome.

I'll have to take your word for it, I don't think I've ever met a viking in person. [But he's spent time in the EHS locker room during basketball games and that can be kinda like the same thing.] Better than our gods, anyway.

[Okay. Okay, he can't help it.] You don't seem stupid. Or burly. Or…[He sort of just waves a hand to gesture to him. Or loud. Argumentative, yeah, but not really loud. So?]

Yeah, that's pretty much how I got the name. A Hiccup is the runt of the litter, you call sheep and pigs by it, too, and I was born premature, so. Yeah, that's a thing. My dad is huge, though.

...Hiccup. [Well. Then again, dude celebrates something called Snoggletog, what was he really expecting?] Definitely not a name I'd pick for a viking but it kinda suits you. [Wow that sounded much less insulting in his head.]

And yet you're the one with the dragon?

And yet, yeah.

[ He rolls his eyes as the offense fritters over him with the same casual undertaking as usual, too accustomed to it on Berk to really bother making a big deal out of it here. He calls for Toothless, and the dragon returns to his side chewing a hunk of fish, momentarily distracting him from the locket. ]

What is that? Did you get into the freezer again? Bad dragon, very bad dragon! [ Toothless grumbles as he argues back, rumbling in discontent about being told off, and Hiccup uses both hands to open his dragon's mouth and stick his head inside. ] You had at least three of those trouts, didn't you? I can see the spines, bud, don't lie! This is why you have to chew your food.

[ Bickering like a married couple, boy and dragon have their own back-and-forth for a few long moments after ('What have I told you about spoiling your appetite?' 'GRAAAUGHH, ARGHRRGH.' 'If all the other dragons got fat for Snoggletog, would you do that too?' 'HRRRRNNNGHH!!' 'Don't give me that face, Mister Greedy.') ]

…it's like having an overgrown house cat with fangs. [He's just watching in fascination, though he's a little concerned that Hiccup's practically climbing inside Toothless's mouth but apparently that's normal.

On what planet are these things normal?

This raises a much, much better question though.]

Uh. How are you…keeping him inside? [Because bro. As far as he knows dragons shouldn't fit inside bedrooms, Station-sized or not.] I mean it's not my business but the last dragon I saw was tiny. [He just makes a box-shape with his hands to indicate Rizhao's size. And there's the better question.]

And if Jack gets too close does he start to melt? [Okay, that's not a serious question at all but nevertheless.]

It kind of is. Dragon breeds have characteristics of lots of animals, it depends what type they are and how they survive. Toothless is a Night Fury, the fastest dragon breed around, so he has to have big stealthy paws and night-vision eyes to see in the dark. I guess he's more like a cat than any other animal, sometimes.

[ He slouches against Toothless, tickling under his chin and gaining one big puppycat of a dragon in the process. Hiccup tilts the locket to show the opposite wall's melted rockface; hollowed out enough to fit his Night Fury inside, at least while Toothless curls up to sleep by the fire. Someone's been making extensions, oops. ]

We usually keep the door open, he turns sideways to get in and out of the room and he doesn't wear his saddle while we're below-ground.

[ Hiccup grins at the thought of Jack melting. ]

Ol' Jokul Frosti gets a little damp if he hangs out by Toothless since dragons have a naturally warm hide while they're awake or hibernating, they only get cold when they sleep, unless it's a conscious effort in winter, but Jack's flesh and blood like anyone else. He doesn't turn into a puddle.

Edited (typo like a pro) 2014-12-09 18:35 (UTC)

Everything I've ever heard about dragons back home shows them to be…y'know, kinda vicious? I mean we don't actually have dragons where I'm from, but this place is still proving all of the books and movies wrong about them so far. Looks like you've got him really trained…wait, you named him Toothless?

[That shouldn't be cute. It's totally not cute. Okay it's kinda cute and he's just studying Hiccup's handiwork for dragon-accommodations.]

Good to know. [Give him a second.] You know, Toothless probably wouldn't look bad in a Santa Claus hat. Part of the festivities and everything.

✈ fifth snowy flight ❄ — video (both courts)

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