(first stake) video ✧ open to both courts

[herotypical]

[ the locket swings jarringly into action -- like a camera stuck to a pendulum, shuddering back and forth and only occasionally picking up a stern-eyed blonde. ] Ugh. Whose idea was it to glue a webcam onto a necklace--

[ there! steadied. there is first a grimace and then a forced smile and then a flutter of girlish eyelashes. ] First order of business? Those of you still bumming around the Station -- could you tell me how those repairs are coming along? I'm feeling a serious oncoming modernity craving. Like, a gallon of lattes and underwear that doesn't require learning whole new categories of knots.

Second: does anyone know how to make a quick buck outside shilling it for either court? [ she is not a fan of either of the caers. ] Preferably while also maintaining some facade of dignity.

And third and last but absolutely never least: does the name Sunnydale mean anything to anyone? Y'know, anyone other than the someones I've already talked with. [ hey! it's worth asking. doubly so now that it looks like she's here for the long(ish) haul. double ugh. ]

Comments

[herotypical]

[ oh sweet mercy if she had a drink in hand now would be the perfect time for a spit take. ]

Look. I didn't mean your face was deficient--

[smithwork]

[ You started this, Buff. ]

Could you tip a yak? Force a dragon to sit down using only your thighs? Then I'm disappointed in you and you're not the girl for me. I'm glad we straightened this all out.

[herotypical]

[ oh buddy she can absolutely tip a yak. she can tip five yaks. she can tip yaks all day. sadly, she can't boast about her hypothetical yak-tipping because she's not keen to go all blast announcement on her slayer dealio. ]

A little early to be discussing anyone's thighs, isn't it?

[smithwork]

This relationship is moving along at breakneck speeds, I have to say. Some sort of record is being set here.

[herotypical]

Who needs romance and candlelight when you've got -- uh -- thatch roofs and those funny boats with the llama heads?

[ dragon. dragon heads. just -- yeah. ]

[smithwork]

I have no idea what a llama is but I'm going to skip an explanation I don't care about to assume you're being facetious, Miss Sassy.

[ Progression up the rank ladder: Miss to Miss Sassy, next on the list Sarcasm Valkyrie. ]

And I can do romance. [ Protesting that because hmph. ] I take Astrid to the Dragon Training Academy every now and then for a date.

[ No, Hiccup, she just humours you because you love that place too much to understand it's a shitty locale for sweethearts. ]

[herotypical]

[ oh pretty pretty please she so wants to be a sarcasm valkyrie. the stupid courts can keep their stupid titles -- she'll wear that one proudly. ]

Hiccup. Hiccup Hiccup Hiccup. My very very new but alarmingly confessional friend -- I can't even begin to count the things that trouble me about that statement.

Let's start with: every now and then. Dates shouldn't sound like they're on the same schedule as when you clip your toenails. [ ... ] You do clip your toenails, right?

[ or do they (MUCH LIKE YOUR VIKING BEARD) also not grow. ]

[smithwork]

[ ;lkjdff LEAVE HIS ALMIGHTY SOMEDAY-BEARD ALONE. Laughing, wow. ]

You're so mean and rude, how did you ever successfully integrate into society like this? [ Meanwhile he's just as rude so it pans out. ] Also I'm busy training dragons, working as a blacksmith and dabbling in a little cartography as a side-hobby, she knows I don't have time to go lounging about every single night. Never mind that, though, forget I need a life too. Buffy, now that me and you are dating, as of this very moment, exactly how many times do you expect to be taken out?

[ ... Mildly, genuinely curious. He is not a bad boyfriend!! Probably. Most likely. ]

[herotypical]

Oh. Cartography on the side. Well excuse me! [ we got a badass over here. ]

Three times weekly. And one of those has gotta be brunch. But either of the non-brunch options becomes suddenly negotiable in return for sweet-ass axes.

[ hey. he's the one who brought up the blacksmithing again. ]

[smithwork]

Maps are very important, yes, you're excused. No axes for you.

[ !! Deja Vu of talking to Astrid, whoa. ]

Assuming you're going to see me anyway over the course of this week, why do three of these occasions have to stand out? Once seems enough for anybody.

[herotypical]

Once is never enough.

[smithwork]

Attention-seeking isn't attractive.

[herotypical]

[ gasp! shock! dry snickering! ]

Are you calling me what I think you're calling me?

[smithwork]

[ Ohohohoooo. ]

What do you think I think I'm calling you?

[herotypical]

Rhymes with...ascension door.

[smithwork]

I would never.

[ Biting his lip as he smiles, completely innocent. ]

[herotypical]

You're smirking! [ eyes narrow. ] That's a smirk.

[smithwork]

[ Nooo, must stop the smirk. Must ... ]

I think you should lie down, you're imagining things.

[herotypical]

Oh. Please. I am never lying down in Daonna again. I think even the fleas are infected with smaller, more persistent fleas. I almost feel bad for them.

[smithwork]

You should come back to the Station and try some of the I'm Sorry I Blew Stuff Up fish stew I'm working on. After, y'know, bathing. Grooming.

[ Not so much a fan of fleas either. ]

[herotypical]

[ you know you're in a bad place when a viking is telling you to take a bath. ]

I...didn't know they made a stew for that.

[smithwork]

[ Hey, he bathes every Saturday, excuse you. ]

And don't forget the Please Don't Hate Me For Destroying Your Wall loaf, freshly out the oven for said meal.

[herotypical]

What are the chances you might also make a Sorry For Implying You Were An Attention Whore cheesecake, too?

[smithwork]

If someone wants to translate the English recipe books around here into Drabbish, I'll have a go at throwing together the ingredients.

[ He'll try and make you cheesecake if you need it, Buffy. 'Try' being the operative word. ]

Although, cheesecake sounds a little gross.

[herotypical]

You''ll just have to trust me. It's dee-licious.

[ you have no reason to ever trust her seriously don't. ]